Today, while trying to have a serious conversation with my husband about his drug use over text, he came home. Drunk. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, my husband came home drunk off his ass at 2am. He started crying on my shoulder because he couldn't go home with some beautiful woman who hit on him, because sadly for him, he's married to me. FML
Today, I was texting my boyfriend about yesterday, where he told me how much he loved me, and he wishes we lived closer. I asked him if he really meant it. Turns out he was drunk, and had no idea what he was talking about. FML
Explain yourself
Today, I received a text message from my wife, who had gone out for the evening with some girlfriends, saying, "I have to take a friend home, she's drunk! I'll be staying at his place. Call you in the morning." Umm… His? FML
Today, the guy I've been sleeping with for the last three weeks got really drunk. I drove him home from the party and took care of him. At 2am he asked for the phone. When I asked what for, he said he wanted to drunk dial his girlfriend. FML
Party animal
Today, my husband woke up, tried walking to the bathroom, fell down, got back up and started peeing on the carpet. I’ve never seen him this drunk before. FML
Girl…
Today, I got a text message. It said, "I'm so drunk. What you up to, girl?" It was my dad. FML
Wait for the hangover
Today, my husband came home late from drinking with his buddies, only to toss and turn and keep me up for an hour. He then sat up and didn't move for a few minutes. I sat up to see what was wrong, only to see him pissing on the carpet beside our bed. FML
Today, I found out I'm pregnant. My husband reacted by going out and smoking weed, then getting completely shitfaced, and having his buddies drag his nearly-comatose carcass back home from a strip club. FML
Dude, chill out
Today, my friend got a text showing his girlfriend cheating on him. Sounds like his FML, but he was at my house. He then worked his way through a bottle of my whisky and went into a drunken rage. He threw my furniture through windows, punched holes in the wall, and smashed stuff until I had to call the cops. FML
Today, I drunk texted a guy I like. We'd met at an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting. FML
Top comments
Southerndatageek 2
Who has a serious conversation like that via text?
safetyword 0
YDI for trying to have a serious conversation via text.
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Comments (131)
ZeeBest86 6
to the people who didn't associate alcohol with drugs, you may want to do a little research on a list of the top ten most lethal drugs for any human being. alcohol is generally number 4 or 5. Just because it's socially acceptable wherever u reside doesn't make it less harmful for you and the people around you. http://www.bukisa.com/articles/269114_the-most-dangerous-drugs
slsrox1298 0
dump his ass
robberry 11
How is texting having a "serious discussion?" Are you 13?
lamergamer02 0
text just messes everything up
skyeyez9 25
Is your husband Charlie Sheen?
Monkeybutt1 0
You need to TALK to him not txt him about it
munyarl 0
Sounds like he hates his life. Just sayin ..
riverfreebird 4
Two words: Alcoholics Anonymous
j_cat187 20
drunk people are fun unless they are a douche that fails at talking shit
DrCee 0
I know it is difficult and living with an addict is not fun. However, research has shown that it is not a choice but a brain disease. Talking won't help, take him to rehab and just be the amazing and supportive wife that you are