Today, while in bed with my boyfriend of 2 years, he mentioned what it would be like if he had sex with anyone other than me. I mentioned the same about him. He quickly yelled, "No, you're a woman. You are mine!" FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend of three years decided it was finally time to have sex. After we did, he told me that he was sleeping with another girl. He wanted to have sex with me to see who was better. FML
Today, I had sex with a guy I've liked for ages. We were lying in his bed afterwards, and he mumbled the word "happy". I thought it was really sweet, until he repeated himself. "My girlfriend probably won't be too happy about this." FML
Today, I was in bed with my boyfriend, in the middle of foreplay, and somehow out of my mouth came, "I want to be inside you." I'm a woman. FML
Today, I was with my boyfriend, and things were getting pretty heated. Trying to be sexy, I told him that every time we touched was a guilty pleasure. He rolled off of me, and said "Oh, you're married too?" FML
Today, my boyfriend asked when I was going to bed, because he wanted to have sex. With himself. FML
Today, while me and my boyfriend were having sex, he moaned out his own name. FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, he called me "Mom." FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, he told me I was the love of his life. Afterwards, he clarified his statement. I was the love of his life, because I was in his life at that moment. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting pretty hot and heavy, then he said, "Let's pretend you're someone else." FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's apartment. He started coming on to me so I pushed him away and said, "No chance." He said "Well, I'm horny, so I'm gonna take care of it myself. Can you go home now?" FML
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Top comments
illinoiscentral 16
Being possessive isn't good at all. Double standards aren't cool either
movaa 11
he mentions sleeping with another woman AND hes a sexist asshole. Yeah... RUN
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Comments (93)
allplayedout 20
You've already wasted two years with somebody who literally believes you're his property. Send him on the long Bye train to Nopeville before any more time goes by.
kalbrek009 20
Sounds chauvinistic/sexist to me....tell your man-child that it doesn't work that way (he doesn't get to hop around to other women & be unfaithful while you remain as such to only him) & don't buy into that bs about "how it's hard wired into a man to have many mates" because, if that's how he thinks...move on w/out him & tell him to go buy a toy so he can fantasize what his statement is like once you're gone.
chocolatefrog28 29
That was when you reached under the blankets, grabbed his junk and told him you'd make him a woman if he didn't cut that line of thinking off at the pass, right?
YepThatsMeee 23
NOOO that's a thing you should NEVER EVER say to your guy if you want him to go to sleep beside you again... If a girl threatened to do a Lorena Bobbitt on me I would leave her instantly. Even if she were a billionaire supermodel genius sex goddess and we had 5 kids together.
chocolatefrog28 29
Even if you'd already dragged her back to your cave by the hair, and peed on her to mark your territory?
Joestarry 8
He's supporting the PATRIARCHY!!! >:^(((. You should chop off his balls like a real womyn
interesting33 37
I read this as he might have been joking.
kittymisfit 13
time to break up.
ecstasy22 12
such a douche and hypocrite
elizacandle 29
what a sexist bastard.
sgardner10682 4
kinda 50/50 on that one. I hate double standards.
Ki11erC 18
Mentioned or asked what it would be like? I'm done rereading this to try and put it back into English.
iwadasn 33
"What it would be like if" means it's hypothetical.