Today, while in bed with my boyfriend of 2 years, he mentioned what it would be like if he had sex with anyone other than me. I mentioned the same about him. He quickly yelled, "No, you're a woman. You are mine!" FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend of three years decided it was finally time to have sex. After we did, he told me that he was sleeping with another girl. He wanted to have sex with me to see who was better. FML
Today, I had sex with a guy I've liked for ages. We were lying in his bed afterwards, and he mumbled the word "happy". I thought it was really sweet, until he repeated himself. "My girlfriend probably won't be too happy about this." FML
Today, I was in bed with my boyfriend, in the middle of foreplay, and somehow out of my mouth came, "I want to be inside you." I'm a woman. FML
Today, I was with my boyfriend, and things were getting pretty heated. Trying to be sexy, I told him that every time we touched was a guilty pleasure. He rolled off of me, and said "Oh, you're married too?" FML
Today, my boyfriend asked when I was going to bed, because he wanted to have sex. With himself. FML
Today, while me and my boyfriend were having sex, he moaned out his own name. FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, he called me "Mom." FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, he told me I was the love of his life. Afterwards, he clarified his statement. I was the love of his life, because I was in his life at that moment. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting pretty hot and heavy, then he said, "Let's pretend you're someone else." FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's apartment. He started coming on to me so I pushed him away and said, "No chance." He said "Well, I'm horny, so I'm gonna take care of it myself. Can you go home now?" FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
illinoiscentral 16
Being possessive isn't good at all. Double standards aren't cool either
movaa 11
he mentions sleeping with another woman AND hes a sexist asshole. Yeah... RUN
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (93)
m22100 14
And let the feminist attacks begin.
HarshD9619 34
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
He's possessive, that's good OP
OnceUponABear 16
Only sometimes. Some take it a little too far.
stevenN659 24
Possessive yes, but Id say he is more inclined to sleep around.
kshawtaybayblade 4
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
^it sounds like he was being really sarcastic.
Harpy20 24
6, I had an ex like that. Did the same as OP's guy and he eventually did start cheating and his excuse was some bullshit about how men are supposed to "spread their seed" and how women are supposed to be monogamous. Tool.
FabiusSpeck 3
Why you call someone tool when you're clearly being the ignorant? Look up some human biology then come back.
Jessie_bean_ 4
She was probably calling him a tool because she was pissed about the double standard? And yeah you're right but society also dictates how our relationships are aswell. Also I don't think many women want someone with that little self control...
illinoiscentral 16
Being possessive isn't good at all. Double standards aren't cool either
Meaniebobeanie 26
I'd just like to say that being possessive isn't necessarily bad. My girlfriend likes that I'm possessive. So what if I don't wanna share her? Buuuttt in this case it's very hypocritical of him.
illinoiscentral 16
I don't know, man. Your girlfriend might like it, maybe it flatters her, but similarly some people are flattered by their partner's jealousy or machismo. Not good things. Now on the other hand, if you mean commitment, loyalty? That's all good! Being possessive? Not good. You're not entitled to an another person. If your girlfriend decided to break up with you, what would you do, since you're, as you say, possessive? Would you just unilaterally take possession of her, claim you own her or something? I don't think so, that's pretty psycho.
m22100 14
Wth. I posted the same thing for #1 and it got deleted.
MrConcise 35
Remind him your ****** is a privilege, he can buy a fleshlight if he wants to wonder what other girls feel like. Or, he can not be an insecure **** and you both can wonder about other people. Genius!
Hasselhoffart 15
Check your ****** privilege CIS scum
movaa 11
he mentions sleeping with another woman AND hes a sexist asshole. Yeah... RUN
kshawtaybayblade 4
OP I am guessing that he was being sarcastic because the way you wrote it it sounded that way. Don't be so butt hurt OP.
movaa 11
I don't know about anyone else but if my boyfriend / husband was talking about sleeping with other people even in a "sarcastic" way, I would be "butt hurt " too.
kaceyma 5
if it just "sounds like" he was being sarcastic, then it's an unfair assumption to say she is butthurt
GOtllt 17
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Maybe your boyfriend is just trying to say "I love you" in his own little, slightly sexist, way?
chosha_fml 27
#12 Slightly?
MommaGriffith 6
Because nothing says "I love you" like sexism. Sarcasm however is the perfect form of rude ways to say I love you!
mosquito19 14
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
well done, very clever answer.