Today, while in bed with my boyfriend of 2 years, he mentioned what it would be like if he had sex with anyone other than me. I mentioned the same about him. He quickly yelled, "No, you're a woman. You are mine!" FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend of three years decided it was finally time to have sex. After we did, he told me that he was sleeping with another girl. He wanted to have sex with me to see who was better. FML
Today, I had sex with a guy I've liked for ages. We were lying in his bed afterwards, and he mumbled the word "happy". I thought it was really sweet, until he repeated himself. "My girlfriend probably won't be too happy about this." FML
Today, I was in bed with my boyfriend, in the middle of foreplay, and somehow out of my mouth came, "I want to be inside you." I'm a woman. FML
Today, I was with my boyfriend, and things were getting pretty heated. Trying to be sexy, I told him that every time we touched was a guilty pleasure. He rolled off of me, and said "Oh, you're married too?" FML
Today, my boyfriend asked when I was going to bed, because he wanted to have sex. With himself. FML
Today, while me and my boyfriend were having sex, he moaned out his own name. FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, he called me "Mom." FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, he told me I was the love of his life. Afterwards, he clarified his statement. I was the love of his life, because I was in his life at that moment. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting pretty hot and heavy, then he said, "Let's pretend you're someone else." FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's apartment. He started coming on to me so I pushed him away and said, "No chance." He said "Well, I'm horny, so I'm gonna take care of it myself. Can you go home now?" FML
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Top comments
illinoiscentral 16
Being possessive isn't good at all. Double standards aren't cool either
movaa 11
he mentions sleeping with another woman AND hes a sexist asshole. Yeah... RUN
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Comments (93)
BlueScales 15
Sexist much? Jeez
shotgun_girl 17
I'd get up and tell him "I'm going to have sex with someone else. Oh but no worries-I can't be cheating on my ex right?" then leave.
rinzlerkitty94 31
Uh, you mean ex-boyfriend, right? Because I would have dumped his sexist ass for that.
amazed_71 14
If he's as bad as he sounds, RUN, don't walk, to the nearest exit.
trumpet27 1
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
How is this an FML?! I swear that 90% of FMLs like this that get past the moderation process are stupid ones like this one where it's not an FML, but apparently it is. Really?!