Today, while having sex with my husband, we had to move around our cat during position changes. Our cat controls our sex life. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend in the missionary position. Once again, our cat decided to crawl onto his back and stare at me. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. As we were getting into it, his cat came into the room, sat, and stared us down with what looked like disapproving eyes. After 5 minutes had gone by, we stopped completely. A cat just cockblocked me. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, when we heard a screech. My two cats were having it harder than us. FML
Today, I was making out with my girlfriend in my room. About two minutes into it, my cat walks in and jumps on the bed with us. Without hesitation, my girlfriend tells me to stop, rolls over, and starts petting my cat. FML
Today, I was having it off with my boyfriend. He's the kind of guy that likes to keep things interesting. Just as he started climaxing, he began to meow. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were making love for the first time, when out of nowhere my cat meowed from the doorway. My boyfriend sighed, pulled out, and exasperatedly called me a selfish bitch for not having put my cat outside. FML
Today, when my boyfriend and I were becoming intimate, his cat decides to jump onto the bed and lie right in between us. He then informs me that he wanted to stop to "preserve his cat's innocence." FML
Today, I woke up with my girl laying next to me in bed. When she woke up we started to get hot and heavy but all of a sudden our cat hops on the bed. I guess the cat was more important cause my girl got up started playing it instead of me. Cockblocked by another pussy. FML
Today, my wife and I were getting intimate for the first time in several months. Then we heard our son yelling from the other room needing my help. He needed me to scratch his foot because the cat was on his lap and he couldn't reach it. FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend has a fetish for cats. I think I'm going to have to meow before we do anything together. FML
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Top comments
luc887_fml 28
Cats control everything. "Dogs have masters, cats have slaves."
imp4ct 15
pussyblocked?
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Comments (121)
flashback_fml 14
They like being watched by a cat, it turns them on
Girlie7 11
Maybe OP might have been like "move that pussy",her husband might have moved the wrong pussy..
chosha_fml 27
Y sooooooooo DI. Most easily solved problem ever.
FlyingPie 17
Are you kitten me?
bayliebug 14
How is this not a complete YDI? I mean, I feel bad moving my cat around when he looks cozy... But I'd still do it if it was interfering with my ability to please my husband.
ropeandneck 7
now that, is a woman. all my respects, ma'am.
tishtashbat 16
100% YDI, this is entirely your fault if you can't make the effort to move the cat into another room. You are not controlled by the animal you chose to get, you can choose to get rid of it as well. Not necessarily permanently, but into another room or outside the house.
ulissey_fml 22
so THAT's your pet position !
mythicaltimes 15
kittens are cute, cats are terrible.
LeFrogDog 27
the cat had a camera on its head, better a cat then a uncle
raeepressley 12
Put your cat in a different room. I have to do that with my dogs or they try and jump on the bed. One of my dogs is very protected over people she thinks are getting hurt. So away they go!