Today, I was making out with my girlfriend in my room. About two minutes into it, my cat walks in and jumps on the bed with us. Without hesitation, my girlfriend tells me to stop, rolls over, and starts petting my cat. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was woken up by my roommates cat meowing so loudly at her door, wanting in. Suddenly it stopped. I was just falling back into sleep when I rolled over and the cat was right there beside my head. Meowing. FML
Today, I awoke to my cat sitting on my chest. That wouldn't be so bad if I hadn't tried to get her off. She promptly went crazy and scratched me. My fiancée, who was sleeping next to me, hit me, called me cruel, and told me to apologize to the cat. I did. FML
Today, I didn't realize my cat was sleeping in the room with me until she decided to jump on me in the middle of the night, resulting in a critical hit to my groin. FML
Today, I was singing to my cat and she reached up and put her paw over my mouth. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I slept naked after a great night together. I awoke to a sharp pain in my penis and found our cat trying a new scratching post. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I walked to her couch while kissing with our eyes closed. Stumbling, we reached the couch and dropped our bodies, her on top of me. What I didn't know was that her kitty, Elvis, was napping. Elvis was very angry. FML
Today, my girlfriend decided it would be a funny idea to spray me with a hose while I was holding a kitten, showing her how cute we were. Needless to say, now I'm covered head to toe in cat scratches. FML
Today, I was messing with my cat by moving my hand around under the sheets to make it look like a mouse, making him pounce at it. Without thinking, I brought my hand up to scratch my nose and was immediately attacked by flailing claws. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were starting to do the deed and she started popping zits on my chest. Then she said that I was killing the mood because my cat was meowing. FML
Today, my cat fell into the toilet, jumped out, and ran straight to hide in my bed. FML
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Top comments
alkanechain 0
You got c**kblocked by a p***y?
tigrouficele2012 44
Awwwwwww. So cute! Sorry, I just have a thing for kitty cats. Looks like your girlfriend does too. Lighten up.
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Comments (116)
Brockbfball1563 5
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CEmSDQR_7vU
mcrgirljessica 0
Ha Ha Awesome !!!
KaanTech 0
Yea being **** blocked by cat lol
mizzkitty 0
fourth... lol nice cats are cool
Caayouteepie 0
You sir*** are the idiot. If you're going to insult, at least learn how to spell correctly.
chelzy 0
damn... u read my mind.
akiranozaki 0
Says the idiot replying to the wrong comment. Good job.
tttron 0
win
Sakura47 0
Actually i think he really meant "sire" and not sir. It's used often when you joke with someone respectfully.
South_Park_Shay 0
maybe she wanted to see her ct, don't be a sensitive a**.
YDIbigtimebro 4
H
alkanechain 0
You got c**kblocked by a p***y?
Mattrocker 4
Aww, I was gonna say that
darkmis1 18
^win
Professor59 2
Happens to me all the time. OK, she's had the cat 18 years and I've only been here for the last three, but geeeeezzzzzzz. When this cat finally passes, I will finally move up on the list!
MittenKitten 4
^ that's so mean :( Id do the same thing as his girlfriend! I love cats :D making out can wait a few minutes while I pet a kitty
brianrubin 0
Honestly that's not that bad. I do the same thing sometimes to appease the cat so it'll leave. ^_~
aicky 0
aww she likes stroking your pussy!
Ky_123 0
kitty seks
TheLoneWolf87 4
Two ******* = threesome
HockeyFanNick 4
A guy who has a cat? You deserve it.
CheeseHater 23
Omfg, you probably have never seen a cat, they are, in fact, the cutest animal on this shitty planet. You see, guys love cats because you can't be serious about hating them. OP, your cat is probably alot more fun than you, get over it.
SillyPoop 0
This Should be a sign she likes pussy better than you!
koolkat27 13
Whats the mattet, dont like *******?