Today, while driving home from work, I noticed the driver next to me was happily chatting on her phone. I fucking despise these would-be murderers, so I slammed my horn to signal my disgust. She panicked and swerved straight into my car. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I saw a woman still texting on her phone as she started to drive away when the light turned green. I made sure to stare her down and give her a dirty look because she wasn't paying attention to driving. She laughed as I rear-ended the car in front of me. FML
Today, I was driving when a woman started crossing the street against the light at the upcoming intersection, so I slammed on the brakes and stopped short of hitting her. That's when she intentionally jumped onto my car and started screaming that I had "mowed her down". The cops believed her. FML
Today, I was driving home from work and noticed the car behind me was tailgating me pretty badly. I was starting to get angry with the driver, and kept glancing in my rear view mirror at him. While I was doing so, the traffic ahead of me stopped, and I rear-ended the car in front of me. FML
Today, I was in a car accident. After screaming at the woman for running into me, I got in my car and drove off. As I was driving away, I was staring her down when I ended up rear-ending the person in front of me. FML
Today, I was driving to work when I was almost hit by a teenage driver. I gave her the finger and shouted "F*** you!" making sure that she heard me. I then saw my boss glaring at me from the passenger seat. FML
Today, while driving to a client's home, I received a text. Since I loathe those who text and drive, I pulled into a convenience store's parking lot. While I was texting, a car sped into the lot, rear-ending my car. FML
Today, I was driving around a parking lot, looking for an empty spot. Someone was backing out a bit too quickly as I was about to pass by, so I honked to announce myself. The driver instead panicked and reversed into my front bumper. FML
Today, I was walking through a crosswalk when a lady in a car looked at me with a horrified expression and then hit her door locks repeatedly. FML
Today, I was driving to work and stopped at a stop light. A full 2 or 3 seconds passed, followed by a car rear-ending me. The idiot driving it got out and gave me hell, calling me a maniac because I braked "too quickly" and didn't give him a chance to react. FML
Today, I was sitting in a parked car. A woman was having difficulties maneuvering out. She honked the horn repeatedly for me to move, then looked me in the eye and called me a "f**king bitch", before driving off. I was in the passenger seat. FML
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Top comments
KBear3109 29
Never startle a distracted driver, YDI.
paperroll880 16
Hahah... Should've known better
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Comments (469)
miamonsterkitty 6
I think you overreacted a bit. it wasn't like they were drunk. so yeah, ur ******* fault. actually, u honking ur horn could have caused a huger accident than that, so ur no better than the cell-phone user.
gionatorinc 5
why is this a medical fml?
disccomp 3
You deserve it, pretentious prick.
Zekumi 2
You don't sound like you know what "pretentious" means.
UsagiArwen 23
Pretentious: Attempting to impress by affecting greater importance, talent, culture, etc., than is actually possessed. Actually I think that fits quite well. Op *did* try and show that op was in fact better than this driver by acting like the frickin cell phone police. Now did op try and impress? Not entirely sure. I think op did try to impress the fml site with policing "abilities". But beyond that, idk.
Sugah_Shane1 2
Yeah you deserve that one. I hate road rage idiots who think they have to blare their horn at everything much worse than people who talk on their phone and drive
rhoda279 2
Hope she had insurance!
TacoBelle 8
What kind of idiot driver is she if she runs into someone when she's honked at? Maybe that's evidence that she shouldn't be on the phone instead of paying attention to her driving.
Pazu_fml 10
It was reckless to respond to a sudden noise by crashing into another car. The driver WAS dangerous.
fatalwish 6
yeah... i hate people who talk on cels while driving too ******* air stealers in my opinion
Awnonymous 4
You're a ******* retard.
chrisdoghaha 3
I hate when people try and act like they the freakin police. Smh!