Today, while bending over to get the brownies I was making out of the oven, my husband slapped my butt. I fell into the oven. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend came home while I was making a snack in the kitchen. We started making out and he lifted me up and sat my ass on the hot stove. FML
Today, I was baking cookies. When I took the tray out of the oven, I closed the door, but it bounced back open and hit me in the back of the knees. That caused me to sit down on the hot oven door. I was only wearing my short bathrobe and no underwear. I really burned my ass and, um… stuff. FML
Today, after placing it on top of the stove, my hot tray of freshly-baked cookies slipped. I caught it, though. With my bare hand. FML
Today, as I was on the floor playing with the dog, my husband walked past, tripped over something, and fell on me, smashing his bony elbow right into my crotch. FML
Today, I got slapped in the face by my girlfriend with a banana skin, because I finished up the chocolate cake. FML
Today, my boyfriend was cooking me dinner. He walked away and I decided to help by giving the pan of veggies a sautee flip. My boyfriend failed to mention that he had just pulled that pan out of a 500 degree oven. FML
Today, I was leaning over cleaning a table at work, when my pretty coworker came up behind me and slapped me on the butt. I was so startled that I slipped and smashed my face into the table. Now she can't look at me without laughing. FML
Today, I was in a hurry to get something out of the oven, so I quickly grabbed my roommate's only oven mitt and grabbed the pan in the oven. It didn't take long to figure out there was a hole in it when my thumb hit the hot pan. FML
Today, while house sitting, I went to take my pizza out of the oven, not realizing that the oven mitt had a hole in it. FML
Today, I put on some skimpy shorts and bent down to get something on the bottom shelf of the fridge to get my boyfriend's attention. On my way up, I slammed my head on the edge of the fridge. FML
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Top comments
niiick97_fml 3
priceless.
xdust 4
Hansel and Grettal all over again. Your husband might be a witch.
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Comments (333)
AFwifeKern 0
Bang bang!! Haha oven part sux its the thought tht counts!
areix 0
did you learn your lesson?
Eorlas 31
and now youre probably going to cheat on him
ilovemusic22192 0
Bahaha! So...how 'bout them face brownies?
marinaim 17
This reminds me of the paedo witch in Hansel & Gretel.... Are you hiding something OP? !!
walrus86 0
new sex position...
Georgie_chick 0
oh that just sucks
TabzTheLoserKidd 4
is it bad that I laughed? xD
Tonys_kitten6 0
Wow wtf I would have been so pissed >.<
Wazilla 0
What is with this soght that every women says that men need spmthing extremly painfull done to their dick. "Chop it off" "Set in fire" wtf really. It was an accident get over it. if i acidentally ave you a paper cut you guys would chop off my dick in my sleep or somethimg crazy
Petunia888 13
I agree, there are some psycho chicks out there.
OhhDamnnnnn 3
Awwwwwh;