Today, while bending over to get the brownies I was making out of the oven, my husband slapped my butt. I fell into the oven. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend came home while I was making a snack in the kitchen. We started making out and he lifted me up and sat my ass on the hot stove. FML
Today, I was baking cookies. When I took the tray out of the oven, I closed the door, but it bounced back open and hit me in the back of the knees. That caused me to sit down on the hot oven door. I was only wearing my short bathrobe and no underwear. I really burned my ass and, um… stuff. FML
Today, after placing it on top of the stove, my hot tray of freshly-baked cookies slipped. I caught it, though. With my bare hand. FML
Today, as I was on the floor playing with the dog, my husband walked past, tripped over something, and fell on me, smashing his bony elbow right into my crotch. FML
Today, I got slapped in the face by my girlfriend with a banana skin, because I finished up the chocolate cake. FML
Today, my boyfriend was cooking me dinner. He walked away and I decided to help by giving the pan of veggies a sautee flip. My boyfriend failed to mention that he had just pulled that pan out of a 500 degree oven. FML
Today, I was leaning over cleaning a table at work, when my pretty coworker came up behind me and slapped me on the butt. I was so startled that I slipped and smashed my face into the table. Now she can't look at me without laughing. FML
Today, I was in a hurry to get something out of the oven, so I quickly grabbed my roommate's only oven mitt and grabbed the pan in the oven. It didn't take long to figure out there was a hole in it when my thumb hit the hot pan. FML
Today, while house sitting, I went to take my pizza out of the oven, not realizing that the oven mitt had a hole in it. FML
Today, I put on some skimpy shorts and bent down to get something on the bottom shelf of the fridge to get my boyfriend's attention. On my way up, I slammed my head on the edge of the fridge. FML
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Top comments
niiick97_fml 3
priceless.
xdust 4
Hansel and Grettal all over again. Your husband might be a witch.
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Comments (333)
whipmie87 0
my boyfriend would do this to me. and immediately I would unplug the oven. men can be such pigs!
denvan 0
He probably thought you needed a tan
Jimster1712 0
rednecks...
KagamiSama 0
Hm, it's just you that is unable to read. I think everyone is able to understand it perfectly and not even remotely think about it sounding like that. I read it - got it the first time - got the point and everything. So...learn to read?
canzonetta 16
This is the most annoying grammar error there is. And it is made so often! The way you say it, it sounds like while he was bending over to get your brownies out of the oven, your bent-over husband slapped your butt. You could have said 'While I was bending over to get the brownies out of the oven, my husband slapped my butt', or 'while bending over to get the brownies out of the oven, I had my butt slapped by my husband' but, no, you had to make it sound like your husband was bending over. It is confusing and annoying! WHY!
MJ_Goobs_Xx 0
ummm calm down grammar nazi
emodude44 0
Are you married to Mr. Hansel?
KagamiSama 0
aw man sorry wrong person!! I ment for it to be to #257 /FAIL/
stfuexe 0
maybe he likes you crispy.
TheNewGuy03 29
it seems like the situation is heating up quick, so you'd better hotfoot it out of there, or your ass will be toast! i bet i'll get flamed for this. |the kid|
Darklord6980 5
Are you Jewish?
sincerely331 0
If yu fell into the oven by just one slap on the butt then I think its time to gain weight my friend..
MJ_Goobs_Xx 0
well she must have been trying, she was baking brownies after all