Today, while at my job at a Christian summer camp, I overheard one of the kids swearing. I politely said, "Please, only speak as Jesus would." He paused for a moment and replied, "Go to hell." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my four-year-old son decided to bite my butt during prayer at church. The entire sanctuary heard me instinctively swear at him. FML
Today, a student told me to fuck off. I work with 3 year-olds. FML
Today, I was asked to leave a church service for laughing at the kids trying to sing. FML
Today, my parents punished me and made me wash my mouth out with soap for cursing. I'm almost 19. I said the word "Hell". FML
Today, I accidentally said, "Hell yes!" in front of a potential employer and a group of kids before an interview at a daycare center. FML
Today, a 7-year-old girl came up to me and told me to go fuck myself. I told her to watch her language or else I'd tell her parents. Her mom happened to be nearby and actually heard the conversation; she came up to me and told me to go fuck myself as well. FML
Today, I had to sit and listen to a coworker tell me about how disappointed she is her daughter is a lesbian and wondering if anyone still does those "pray it away" camps. I work in HR so I couldn’t even call her an evil, bigoted witch, because I know I’m the one who’d lose my job. FML
Today, I was made fun of at work by my mom and my supervisor. I work at a kids' anti-bullying camp. FML
Today, after church, my 5-year-old son asked me about God, so I answered his questions in full. We talked about God for over 2 hours. At the end of it all, he pondered for a moment, before saying to me, "That's the stupidest thing I ever heard. You're dumb." FML
Today, I was in the Walmart parking lot listening to some music in my car and some lady comes up to me and say, “Boy, the music you listen to is so unholy, I think you need some Jesus in your life.” FML
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Top comments
hidinginthesky 0
smart kid :)
pertained 12
hey, dyslexics are teeple poo.
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Comments (85)
grant1023 5
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Christmas summer camp?
A7X_LoVeee 10
Christian. -__-
hidinginthesky 0
learn to read.....
Athoritaahhh 0
You sir are a fail. And I've come to a conclusion that you might be mildly retarded or have dyslexia.
Idonebeenhad 17
LYSDECIX OF TEH WLORD UNTIE!!
worldcupcheer17 0
at least as a Christian he believes in hell!
changetheworld 0
YDI for attending a Christian camp.
YourEvilHero 12
people need to stop being so uptight religion
pertained 12
hey, dyslexics are teeple poo.
2ndSucks 15
There's nothing wrong with attending a christian summer camp, op can believe whatever he wants. I'm not gonna lie though, it was a pretty great comeback. :)
grant1023 5
I can't belive I miss red that lol
Susieee_Q 9
A dyslexic Christian believes in Dog.
NitroTonicsFML 4
Just tell him to gtfo.
OWNZ 0
ahh... kids these days!
Slim2306 10
He can't. Jesus wouldn't say gtfo. That would just be hypocritical... which I'm also pretty sure Christians frown upon lol.
hidinginthesky 0
smart kid :)
flavboarder 9
i agree
oooCANDLEMANooo 2
....one of the many reasons people leave the church, dogmatic and patronising garbage like this.
spartan522114 0
You can't swear at any normal summer camp you incompetent fucktard.
imaberry95 0
YEAH FUCKTARD
OkayImSorry 0
I swore at my summervamps. **** religion.
spartan522114 0
One. You did, everyone did, you are still not allowed. Second, your profile says "things I love:... all religions even though I don't believe." Now you say "**** religion." You are a hypocrite and everything you say is invalid. Proceed to hang yourself now.
hiyourcute 0
I agree. I'm not against telling the kid not to swear, but if OP got off his high horse for 2 seconds and said something less patronizing, he might have gotten better results.
OkayImSorry 0
Hell, tell you what. How about you get your little bitch ass over to my place and you can try to make me hang myself. I will rock your pussy ass. I've said "**** women" before but do I love girls? Your damn right I do. What I say and what I feel are two different things. Don't try to call me a hypocrite over the internet you little punk bitch.
spartan522114 0
By definition saying different things from what you feel is being a hypocrite. Also, how nice of you to threaten to beat me up. I guess you gotta make up for your lack of intellect and self admitted small penis. Maybe if you wanted to be taken seriously you'd think about what you say. But I guess that's not cool.
Jaxx66 21
whooo. I gotta favorite this FML so I can see where this fight goes. *gets popcorn* proceed!
5t3ff1k4h 47
69 - **** off, you over-reacting, whiny douche. Calm your balls, handle opposition properly, and maybe you'll be taken more seriously.
5t3ff1k4h 47
73 - Exactly. Eh, people will be people. Also, maybe*, not mayb. Oops.
Quasar55_fml 18
Well, you asked for it :-)
pandapoopDX 0
Praise da lord!
volley4eva1698 0
hahahahahahahhahahahaha this is hilarious
MissRoxiie 12
ya got what you asked for >.
Captain0bv10us 0
Haha...kids these days... but I have to take my hat off to that!
Gorillaninja 0
Guess who is going to hell now?