Today, while at my job at a Christian summer camp, I overheard one of the kids swearing. I politely said, "Please, only speak as Jesus would." He paused for a moment and replied, "Go to hell." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my four-year-old son decided to bite my butt during prayer at church. The entire sanctuary heard me instinctively swear at him. FML
Today, a student told me to fuck off. I work with 3 year-olds. FML
Today, I was asked to leave a church service for laughing at the kids trying to sing. FML
Today, my parents punished me and made me wash my mouth out with soap for cursing. I'm almost 19. I said the word "Hell". FML
Today, I accidentally said, "Hell yes!" in front of a potential employer and a group of kids before an interview at a daycare center. FML
Today, a 7-year-old girl came up to me and told me to go fuck myself. I told her to watch her language or else I'd tell her parents. Her mom happened to be nearby and actually heard the conversation; she came up to me and told me to go fuck myself as well. FML
Today, I had to sit and listen to a coworker tell me about how disappointed she is her daughter is a lesbian and wondering if anyone still does those "pray it away" camps. I work in HR so I couldn’t even call her an evil, bigoted witch, because I know I’m the one who’d lose my job. FML
Today, I was made fun of at work by my mom and my supervisor. I work at a kids' anti-bullying camp. FML
Today, after church, my 5-year-old son asked me about God, so I answered his questions in full. We talked about God for over 2 hours. At the end of it all, he pondered for a moment, before saying to me, "That's the stupidest thing I ever heard. You're dumb." FML
Today, I was in the Walmart parking lot listening to some music in my car and some lady comes up to me and say, “Boy, the music you listen to is so unholy, I think you need some Jesus in your life.” FML
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Top comments
hidinginthesky 0
smart kid :)
pertained 12
hey, dyslexics are teeple poo.
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Comments (85)
holybuckets 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
I don't blame the kid! Christians these days annoy people with their forceful stupid rules. Who cares if the kid cussed?! Sheesh.
Yarrachel 16
I'm not religious, but I wouldn't consider it a stupid rule to tell a kid not to swear at camp. (Or even just a Christian rule for that matter). It's called being polite.
greekamericanpri 2
u shut the hell up Christians now a days can even say god bless u bc someone is gonna get offended we all gotta stop and respect other religions but everyone and there mama can shit all over christians well i hope when those asshole die god farts on their face for being a f####ing ass hole
redbluegreen 41
Can we get a translator over here?
buckeye08 10
#40 - For trying to promote equality for others' religious views, you need to look at the end of your run-on sentence. God loves everyone, so telling God to do bad things to another person is demoting your own religious status. Do us all a favor, and don't become anyones role model.
lalala2589 0
I think every one should stop being whiney little bitches and stop getting offended over how other people talk. I agree it's tacky to swear, but if someone wants to then don't lecture them on it and bitch about how it's offensive. Same with God bless you.
holybuckets 0
You do realize that the kid told him to 'go to hell' for a reason? There are more important and underlying problems that most Christians care to even notice.
je_suis_fml 11
40- you must be a Christian, eh?
Merylwen 24
Amen !
donthurtme956 0
was the camp in North Carolina? :o
Pinkmorgan9 0
Well he's a jerk..
Zebidee 9
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Wouldn't Jesus say "My hands! Oh, the pain!! MAKE IT STOP!!!"
hiyourcute 0
Don't go there bro...
hiyourcute 0
I'm not saying it wasn't funny, just that it's rude... I just think it's generally not a good idea to make fun of people's religion like that.
buckeye08 10
That's not really something to poke fun at dude..
buckeye08 10
That's not really something to poke fun at dude..
dreamering 16
Yeah dude. Don't do that. They'll crucify your butt.
hiyourcute 0
a) I'm not deeply offended or anywhere close for that matter, I just felt the need to defend my comment and I'm so very sorry if I gave the wrong impression, and b) you're right that he's not making fun of the religion per se, but it's the same as making holocaust jokes, which while deeply amusing would also be considered offensive by most Jews I know
Iamnotmyself 17
Actually it would be a comparison to make a joke about Hitler.
hiyourcute 0
Okay fine, perhaps that was a bit drastic... I guess you win this one.
BIEBERSLAYER 10
make him watch passion of the Christ over and over as punishment.
nuclearbastard 1
You're lucky he didn't start speaking Hebrew at you.
sourgirl101 29
Okay, this comment was actually pretty clever!(:
Merylwen 24
Jesus didn't speak Hebrew, he spoke Aramean.
sourgirl101 29
There's reasons to believe that Christ did indeed speak Hebrew but I don't want this to turn into a religious debate.
JokerJohn7 0
you basically begged for that
brianjman14 23
That kid is awesome.
DocBastard 40
That's just wrong! So wrong!! Jesus would have said "Goest thou to Hell".