Today, I had given up on finding my makeup bag with cell phone and iPod my mom had bought for me recently. So I went to art to join the group of girls with whom I share the back art studio of my school. One of them was talking about how she'd ripped off some bitch's stuff, and she held up my bag. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I found a purse in the school bathroom. When I looked inside, there was an iPod along with some other expensive stuff in it. I took it to the office so the right owner would get it back. The owner passed me in the hall on the way there; she freaked out and punched me in the face. FML
Today, I found out that my art project, the one I've been working on for the last two weeks and the first piece I felt really comfortable about turning in, was stolen out of the art cupboard. FML
Today, a "friend" of mine decided stealing my very low amount of sticky notes repetitively to make origami and show off was okay, even though I had repeatedly asked her to stop. Then, when I snapped, I was the bad guy, and everyone who was around started stealing my pencil case to get them. FML
Today, I came home to find my room completely torn apart. My mom and dad start yelling at me asking me why I am doing drugs because she found a tiny baggie on the floor. It was the little bag that spare buttons come in when you buy a dress shirt. FML
Today, I was walking through a rough part of town, when a woman screamed that I'd stolen her bag. I was tackled to the ground by a large guy, who then gave my bag to her. FML
Today, I went to the movies. After it was over I got up and noticed a designer purse sitting on the ground in the back row. I opened it to look for anything that could give me a address so I could return it. The owner came back, assumed I was robbing her, and punched me in the nose. FML
Today, my mother yelled at me for not doing all of my homework. She got so mad, she tore up a drawing I'd spent over a week working on. That was my art homework. FML
Today, my mom went snooping through my art bin to "clean out my old drawings". She found numerous nude pieces and accused me of selling porn. My mom mistook and threw out 57 anatomy practice sketches that I worked very very hard on, and ripped up the remainder of my drawings. FML
Today, I found out where my $300 worth of American Eagle and Hollister clothes had disappeared to. My 16 year old sister shredded them with scissors, took pictures of it for her Myspace and said that I deserved it for being a "conformist." All her "internet friends" said it was awesome. FML
Today, after I got home from school I went to my room to find the maid had cleaned it, also to find a bag labeled "trash" it was all the sketches and paintings I had done in art class, which is my major plan for college. FML
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Top comments
AcesAndEights 0
so.... kick her in the face and take it back? I hope you didn't just stand there
Pipistrello_fml 0
Here's an idea. Stand there like a VICTIM, do nothing to get it back, and blog about it later on FML for sympathy.. Here's a better one "Today, I was in Art c;lass bragging about some stuff I stole from some bitch. She was in the class and throat punched me and got it back. I now have to eat soup for a month. FML"
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Comments (175)
xd0rkiee 0
How fascinating.
Dr_Haiku 0
Agreed, number one This is just so trivial Did you at least fight?
PeopleRSoDumb 0
Punch the bitch and get it back. How is this an FML? The end of it is "So I got my bag back. End of story."
renaet 0
Yes exactly. How is this a FML at all? I hope you at least approached her and said it was yours...
Gasuer 0
Agreed, punch her and get it back, not a FML. If all fails, call the cops on her ass.
Starchild21 3
How is this an FML when you can take care of it right there??? _________________________________ www.myspace.com/rapid99
crazytoaster 2
This FML should've read like this: "Today, I had given up on finding my makeup bag with cell phone and iPod my mom had bought for me recently. So I went to art to join the group of girls with whom I share the back art studio of my school. One of them was talking about how she'd ripped off some bitch's stuff, and she held up my bag. Now i have to spend three hours cleaning brain matter out of the boot of my car after i smashed her head in with a golf club, drove her out of town and threw her into a river. FML"
mamk 0
THIS.
Reyo 2
I agree with #82. OP, try not to look at this as a negative experience. Look at it this way: You now know who's bitchass you need to cave in with your brand new, steel toe boots.
Sionnach 10
If it were me, this would be on that-other-more-positive-site-you-can't-name-here-because-the-overly-territorial-mods'll-delete-your-post, because rearranging that bitches face and taking my stuff back from her after mangling her would definitely Make My Day. ... ... ... Taking bets on whether this post sticks around.
Fcuk__mylyfe 0
Ahahahahahahaha
357oboh 0
@82 Um, to be honest, I don't think that's equal to or less than 300 characters lol. So, it won't work if she were to try to get her FML posted. :D I might sound too technical. Lol.
ryguy997 0
1. punch in face. 2. grab bag. 3. RUN LIKE THE PUSSY YOU ARE!!!
Peacewind 0
you are a genious
landland 0
if it's an FML then it's..."and i was too shy to get it back...."
gress269 4
Steal it back, then go back the next day and proclaim "Hey guys I ripped this bitch's bag off, isn't it awesome?"
fatcow282 8
That comment would have been funny if u left out the last part
AcesAndEights 0
so.... kick her in the face and take it back? I hope you didn't just stand there
jaysweet112197 8
lol she prob did just stand there. since she wrote the fml inless she got beat up after trying to get it :p
Javalounge 0
Bitch-slap that mofo.
teiso_fml 0
Wow, how mean! I hope you got your bag back!
IOwnedYou 0
So.. be a bitch.
FarSide 23
Pour sugar in her gas tank. Take a nail and etch into her hood, "Paybacks are Hell".
CobaltSS 0
Pouring sugar in a gas tank does nothing. Except put sugar sitting at the bottom of the tank, or maybe to get vaporized if its somehow makes it through the filters.
xCrackerx 3
Steal it back and do the same to her.
LoginName 0
Ouch, that's gotta hurt.
IOwnedYou 0
Number 3, You hope she got her bag back instead of her iPod, that her mom bought her?
timewarpist 1
Obviously they mean the bag with the stuff in it.
IOwnedYou 0
Obviously.
MagicMeds 0
lolwut?
eatsleepjb 8
Number 7, the iPod and cellphone were in the bag. Dumbass.
annoyedperson 25
number 17 thank you Cathrine obvious
Pipistrello_fml 0
Here's an idea. Stand there like a VICTIM, do nothing to get it back, and blog about it later on FML for sympathy.. Here's a better one "Today, I was in Art c;lass bragging about some stuff I stole from some bitch. She was in the class and throat punched me and got it back. I now have to eat soup for a month. FML"
CaeliLady 0
Lmao, I much prefer this over the OP.
exquisite 0
If you were too " shy" to do anything then it's YODF, but I do hope you did.
eatsleepjb 8
Yodf?
reneetlovesyou 30
Your own damn fault.
Person1233 13
Did you forget the part.. "I am now going to jail for ripping out her internal organs and shoving them down her throat.." ??
breekeebs 0
good? so now were trying to encourage violence! stupid!
lexa1love 16
Oh I would beat the hell out of someone for stealing my stuff.