Kids: Today, the paternity test came back. It's like I suspected all...

Anonymous 1 July 2016, 16:23 Alingsås, Sweden

Today, the paternity test came back. It's like I suspected all along; my "son" is actually my half-brother. FML

161 comments

Collection

Fall

Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.

Same thing different taste

Anonymous 6 November 2019, 02:30

Family coincidence

Today with a DNA test, I found out that my husband is my half brother. 30 years ago his father made a donation to the sperm bank my mother used, and I’m the result. To make matters worse, I’m pregnant. FML

19 comments

Derek 5 August 2018, 01:30

Today, I found out that my kids are both my half-brothers, and the fertility tests my wife had us do a few years ago showed that I'm sterile. She didn't tell me until I found the test results in her desk and asked her about it. FML

38 comments

Anonymous 10 May 2012, 20:17 Aurora, United States

BREAKING NEWS

Today, I found out that my husband is the biological father of my baby sister. FML

452 comments

Roasted Marshmallows 7 November 2019, 03:30

A sand castle

Today, I took a DNA test and it turns out that the person who I thought was my dad is not my actual dad and my real dad is his best friend. FML

16 comments

Anonymous 26 July 2024, 20:00 United Kingdom

Science, bitch!

Today, one of my twin sons found out he's going to be a dad. His little sister who loves science ended up telling him that, since he has a twin who is genetically identical, he's genetically the baby's dad too. My son, being a bit dim, took this to mean his brother slept with his wife and hit him. FML

4 comments

Ben 18 June 2011, 15:34 United States

Today, I found out that my eight year old son is actually my nephew. FML

544 comments

yayme. 11 July 2013, 22:26 Bismarck, United States

Today, I found out that the weird guy that lives next door is my biological father. FML

75 comments

blacksheep 15 January 2017, 16:00

Today, my 6 brothers and I (a girl) were finally finding out the sex of my mom's baby. It's going to be another boy. FML

53 comments

Anonymous 23 October 2021, 14:00 Enderby, Canada

Copycat

Today, my father-in-law announced the name of his new son, my husband's half-brother. The first name and last name is the same as our son, who I gave birth to 4 months ago. FML

6 comments

candie 27 August 2011, 02:10 United States

Today, thanks to my wife's confession, I found out that the 14 year old child I've raised since I was 16 isn't related to me at all. But at least this narrows the real father down to one of three other guys. FML

287 comments

Pandacupcakelove 26

2 July 2016, 00:04

That is all kinds of ****** up.. And that poor kid will have to live with that :/

Mowmee 14

2 July 2016, 00:08

That's screwed up! Hopefully it doesn't affect your relationship with your son!

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Comments (161)

6969ay 9

5 July 2016, 11:24

Speak your mind, but please try and be respectful.

gusrick 20

6 July 2016, 03:40

Damn! I thought you were a girl and though of the waorst, but it seems it is not SO bad... Still pretty ****** up. Hope you can still be better father than yours.