Today, on my job as a police officer, I received a typical domestic disturbance call. Not so typical was the address. Guess my wife's affair went terribly wrong while I was on shift. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Gotcha
Today, I found out that the "burglar" I caught, punched, and tied up for the cops was actually my wife's secret lover. FML
Now what?
Today, I went on the road for work for the first time in a very long time. I was enjoying lunch with coworkers when my phone got bombarded with calls and texts. Turns out my wife and my mother had gotten into a fight within two hours of me being away. FML
Today, I broke it off with my mistress so that I could work on my marriage. Shortly after, my wife received an anonymous message, saying that I'd been unfaithful. FML
Today, I found out that my wife has been having an affair with the guy who's been trying to get our relationship back on track. FML
Never try this at home
Today, a bunch of cops showed up at my house demanding to see my wife to make sure she was OK. Turns out my insane out-of-state daughter swatted me, calling 911 to tell them I had tied up my wife, and been impersonating her for a week. FML
Today, I punched a drunk woman who kept trying to force herself onto my husband. She turned out to be an off-duty cop. FML
Today, I had to call the police to get my crazy stalker of a neighbor out of my house. When the police arrived, I found out that she was friends with the officer. FML
How could you?
Today, my wife called me at work, screaming in rage that she hated me, that I was a useless lump, that she wishes we'd never met. Did I have an affair or burn the house down? Nope. I set up the kids' backpacks for school today and forgot a library book that was due today. FML
Today, I received frantic calls and messages from my husband wondering where I was and if I was cheating on him. I was in the same house as him. FML
Today, I heard screaming coming from my neighbor's house. Since her husband has a history of abusing her, I called the cops. After they left with him in custody, she called to yell at me because they were "working things out" after "having a few drinks". FML
Top comments
guitarbeast 22
Well at least you can arrest that bastard who was sleeping with your wife… or your wife
windfuelsfire 10
I bet that called up a lot of emotions at once.. FYL OP
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Comments (129)
vbmg152 19
Wow! That sucks! I hope you filed for divorce. It's enough stress being a cop, you don't need to worry about what the wife's doing at home while you're out risking your life!
TheyCallMeDamien 18
That's called karma.
criminallyinked 2
Hope you plan on giving her divorce papers soon. That totally sucks, sorry you found out this way op.
Zebediabolical 45
On the one hand, FYL that you had to deal with it in a professional manner. On the other hand, YDI for not noticing your wife was stepping out on you. Or having someone else step in.
SoultheWolf 19
Sometimes there are no signs of your significant other having an affair. So don't be so harsh on him...
NagainaFier 16
The same planet where vampires sparkle, and 50 shades is considered literature.
gregkingsley 4
People just F on the police all way round.
hateevryone 15
Throw both of them in jail just for the hell of it.
PhishloverA 14
Put her under arrest for being unfaithful
neurodoc 1
Do tase him bro. Do tase him bro.
doglover100 29
I'm sorry.
Karebear480 2
Oh my! I am sorry! What a bitch.