rj
Goddard, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my wife told me she was pregnant. I don't remember having sex since last year. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
baron
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my girlfriend told me she was pregnant. We haven't had sex yet. FML
Shooter71
France 🌶️ Spicy
It's not a competition, but still…
Today, I discovered my wife has had more sex in the last two months than I've had in the last year. FML
Anonymous
United Kingdom 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I found out that my wife has had more sex in the last two months than I have in our last year of marriage. FML
Andrew
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I tried to get my wife to have sex with me, she told me she couldn't because she had her period. She's two months pregnant. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, I found out my wife is pregnant. The problem is she convinced me to get a vasectomy two years ago. FML
doomed
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my fiancée, who believes in "sex after marriage" like me, told me she was pregnant. FML
both are dimwitted
Los Angeles, United States
Today, my ex called, saying she's 3 months pregnant. She seems to have forgotten that we haven't been in the same room, much less friends, in over a year. My dimwitted wife thinks the baby is mine. FML
Broken trust
🌶️ Spicy
Making whoopee
Today, after years of my wife having almost no sex drive, and always insisting on using protection, she suddenly craves unprotected sex like an alcoholic craves booze. I went through her phone and learned why. Yup, she's pregnant, cheated on me since day one, and her scummy side dick skipped town. FML
Anonymous
Iztacalco, Mexico 🌶️ Spicy
That's… sexy
Today, my wife threw up in the middle of sex, then fell asleep right after. I didn't even finish and it'd been over a month since the last time. FML
noneedtostress
Australia 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I realised my period was two weeks late and panicked about being pregnant due to missing a pill a few weeks ago. Then I remembered I haven't had sex in almost a year. FML
Top comments
Il_Maestro 6
Either she cheated or I would recommend seeing a doctor about your memory.
linkinpark98 24
MAURY!
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Comments (288)
Ray_of_midnight 23
Paternity tests may not be relevant. I don't know what the laws are in Kansas, where OP is from, but in many U.S. states, if a woman is married, her husband is legally considered the father of any children born to her no matter who the actual, biological father is. Seems unfair but that's the way it is. Those laws are grounded in English common law and date back hundreds of years to before it was easy to establish parentage beyond a reasonable doubt by means of DNA testing. So hubby may be on the hook for child support legally even if the kid is not his. :-(
groupleader 7
You don't remember her telling you about me?
misterbufford 1
So is it FML for you because she's pregnant by someone else, because you haven't had sex in a year, or because you don't remember?
eman1972 4
Burn. Haven't you heard of twelve-month pregnancies?
friedbunnies 9
And now you know why...
wannabeafreebee 3
That's the problem
Angelrose2004 17
I have to give OP's wife benefit of the doubt here. My fiancé swore that we didn't do anything since way before I became preggo. So either his math was off or I'm an asexual; because there was no other guy in my life. If your wife did cheat, then fyl.
zyzy92 8
Luke, I am not your father.
momo1972 3
She didn't say it was yours
submynutz 3
why are u still married of you havent had sex since last year