rj
Goddard, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my wife told me she was pregnant. I don't remember having sex since last year. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
baron
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my girlfriend told me she was pregnant. We haven't had sex yet. FML
Shooter71
France 🌶️ Spicy
It's not a competition, but still…
Today, I discovered my wife has had more sex in the last two months than I've had in the last year. FML
Anonymous
United Kingdom 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I found out that my wife has had more sex in the last two months than I have in our last year of marriage. FML
Andrew
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I tried to get my wife to have sex with me, she told me she couldn't because she had her period. She's two months pregnant. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, I found out my wife is pregnant. The problem is she convinced me to get a vasectomy two years ago. FML
doomed
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my fiancée, who believes in "sex after marriage" like me, told me she was pregnant. FML
both are dimwitted
Los Angeles, United States
Today, my ex called, saying she's 3 months pregnant. She seems to have forgotten that we haven't been in the same room, much less friends, in over a year. My dimwitted wife thinks the baby is mine. FML
Broken trust
🌶️ Spicy
Making whoopee
Today, after years of my wife having almost no sex drive, and always insisting on using protection, she suddenly craves unprotected sex like an alcoholic craves booze. I went through her phone and learned why. Yup, she's pregnant, cheated on me since day one, and her scummy side dick skipped town. FML
Anonymous
Iztacalco, Mexico 🌶️ Spicy
That's… sexy
Today, my wife threw up in the middle of sex, then fell asleep right after. I didn't even finish and it'd been over a month since the last time. FML
noneedtostress
Australia 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I realised my period was two weeks late and panicked about being pregnant due to missing a pill a few weeks ago. Then I remembered I haven't had sex in almost a year. FML
Top comments
Il_Maestro 6
Either she cheated or I would recommend seeing a doctor about your memory.
linkinpark98 24
MAURY!
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Comments (288)
iCake 13
You so bad in bed? Poor you
KUSH45 0
your ****** stupid
AffenKid 9
Maybe your wife had ninja sex with you whilst you slept...
woahkittycat 0
Maybe you should have had sex with your wife so she wouldn't have went looking for it elsewhere. Just a thought. #Duhhh
rekege 18
Hmm, I dunno... Maybe that's why she cheated on you?? Women get horny too. Gawd. Cheating does suck though. I'm sorry. :(
5t3ff1k4h 47
"Women get horny too." ...Since when is that an excuse to cheat on someone? If you want sex, you go to your significant other. If you don't want sex from them, you owe them some respect. Break up with them.
AgaveLoco 5
And some night of passion, she forgot that your're her husband
4204ever 0
That sucks man. Your wife ****** up
FMLGriff 8
Bad memory, or what would you expect? If you're not going to make love to your wife for a year, YDI...
Anna191919 2
guess you could see that one coming. If you have no sex for a year I think something's wrong with your marriage.
bled111 1
Your wife is a ***** !!