Today, my mom found my pack of cigarettes. She's now making me go to rehab. I had only smoked one cigarette ever just to try it. I didn't even like it. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my mom found my dad's hidden stash of cigarettes. He told her they were mine and now I have to spend two hours at therapy for my "smoking problem" every weekend. I've never smoked. FML
Today, my mom found a pack of cigarettes in my pocket. She hates smoking, so she tore every single cigarette to pieces, then emptied a bag of kitty litter on them. On my bed. FML
Today, my mom spent over $200 getting me tested for every drug in the book. All because I admitted to smoking a single cigarette two years ago. FML
Today, while driving me to the hospital because I was having an asthma attack, my mother lit a cigarette. FML
Today, my dad found out I recently tried weed. He called me a useless waste of air and grounded me for the rest of the year. Then he went outside and smoked his third cigarette of the morning. FML
Today, my mom found my weed stash and went berserk, grounding me and saying she's going to have my bedroom door removed. Less than an hour later, I found her laughing and smoking the same stash with my dad in the backyard. FML
Today, my parents found cigarettes in my car. After a long argument lasting over an hour, I convinced them that they weren't mine and that I don't smoke. A few minutes later, I went to work. Guess who decided to visit me during my smoke break. FML
Today, my mother told me I'm going to get lung cancer. Because she smokes. FML
Today, my mom held an intervention for me. Yesterday, I told her I'd tried pot once. Seven years ago. FML
Today, after secretly smoking for more than two years, I decided to quit. I came home from work to see my wife holding a pack and asking me what was it doing behind the toilet seat. FML
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Top comments
dobiesFTW 1
watch out for the guy saying, "rehab? you came to rehab for cigarettes? I used to suck dick for coke. have you ever sucked dick for cigarettes?!"
alunajoy 5
Rehab just for cigarettes?
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Comments (336)
TheComputerGuy96 16
You don't like it the first time, but you still want to try again, and again, and again, until you can't stop smoking. Even if you don't like them. That's how cigarettes are like.
5t3ff1k4h 47
Wrong. I stopped at half a cigarette and never tried again. Never wanted to.
Residence_fml 4
Wow so many people overreacting here. Also smoking kills is kind of overexaggerated most of the time other factors are involved. There are so many other things we use ALOT in life that gives us cancer, like deoderant spray and make-up or chemicals (in food and everywhere else) or the sun, medicins and so you can go on and on and on. and I'm not a smoker Yeah smoking certainly is bad but OP probably tried one because she/he is strictly not allowed to have one, and come on, never felt the urge to break the rules even though you know it's bad for you? but still YDI OP for buying an entire pack when enough people smoke which you could borrow from even strangers would give you one (smokers seem to have some strange bond together). You knew when your mom caught you she would get mad.
Kawaiichan42 3
I don't know where you live, but where I'm from, smokers don't share their cigarettes with anybody except friends/family.
Klu_Klayu 0
I'm not even sure how to word this comment. I'm gonna go ahead and say fyl for having a bitchy mom. But being a smoker myself, congrats on not getting hooked, but you were a dumbass for buying a whole pack just to try it. I lucked out of getting shit from my parents cuz almost everyone in my family has smoked at one point, or is still smoking. And to everyone freaking out at OP saying he deserved it because he tried it once, c'mon, let's be honest, that's being a little judgmental.
Dark_Takumi 0
they have rehab for smokers?.... wow.... I was pretty sure it was for people that have ACTUAL problems... smoke it up nigga, who gives a shit. we all gonna die sooner or later, may as well go out how you want. oh, and to the stupid bimbo who said "buy singles", it's illegal to sell singles idiot, they aren't for individual sale. ****** tards...
BrownSugar_fml 5
And I said No No No!
dickbombay 0
where there's smoke there's fire): if they smoke they poke.
barbarajean 0
She can't 'make' you go to rehab if your the legal age of smoking.
Senseless_487 29
There are so many people posting comments who need to get off their high-horse. Everyone saying "YDI for trying" is obviously either closed-minded, or sheltered. I, for one, love trying new things, even if I know it's potentially dangerous in the long run. Why not? You only live once, so you should make the most out of the life you're given. And if I develop lung cancer from smoking in 50 years, then I'll say "Oh well, I deserve it because I smoked!" But none of you have to worry about me getting cancer. Nobody else's smoking will affect your life in any way, shape, or form, so you need to get off of other people's cases. I can't count how many times non- or ex-smokers have spewed their facts at me as soon as I light up. It's my choice to smoke, so back off! Now, OP, FYL because your mom overreacted HUGELY, but YDI for buying a whole pack to try one, and not throwing them away. Treat rehab like summer camp!
Taipan_fml 0
"How strange to use 'You only live once' as an excuse to throw it away."
penguinazul 13
This is the way I see it. I chose to smoke because I, personally, found it appealing. I know it's bad for me, but it's not like weed or alcohol which can often times affect your ability to function. If you don't like it, don't do it, but don't hound me for doing something "wrong". It's MY choice, just like you choose to commit whatever "sin" you choose to commit.
katiesmurph 5
Really it doesn't effect other people in any way? Ever heard of second hand smoke? I'm pretty sure it effects people. I don't care if anyone smokes that's their choice but if you lit up around me I'd yell at you too cause I sure don't want to smell it or breathe your smoke
penguinazul 13
Most smokers are considerate of non-smokers and will either A) Move away from you/go outside or B) Ask before they light up. If you, the non-smoker, joins the smoker or allows the person to smoke in front of you, then that's your fault. I hate it when I'm in a smoking area, and a non-smoker comes around and then complains about me smoking. If you don't like it, don't join the party!
PurplePigeon 0
I agree penguin...I try my hardest to be considerate of everyone around me when I feel like having one and if I'm told they mind, I will wait.
Senseless_487 29
99% of smokers are considerate like that, myself included. It's when the non-smokers get self-righteous, or holier-than-thou, that I become kind of a dick about it, especially when I'm in a smoking area.
penguinazul 13
Exactly. It's like I don't smoke weed, but I'm not gonna be all "OMG YOU'RE STUPID FOR SMOKING WEED; DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY BRAINCELLS YOU LOSE EVERY TIME YOU BAKE OUT? OMFGAAAAAAAAAHHHH!" to someone that smokes weed and expect them to stop. It's just stupid.
Kawaiichan42 3
There are lots of smokers who are considerate of others. My boyfriend and best friend both smoke. When my friend comes over, he tries not to smoke a lot because his cigarettes are harsh and bother my eyes. He and his girlfriend came over once, and smoking bothers her, so he didn't smoke at all, and my boyfriend tried to keep the smoking to a minimum because, well, it's polite, but he's not going to completely stop for a night while he's at home.
Sydnery 0
you could have asked a friend or something try one, dont buy a whole pack.
Vayerman 4
F*** your moms life. She has to deal with one of those disgusting smoker types. YDI too, for your own good.
Klu_Klayu 0
Way to be a closed minded, self righteous prick
fmlisforlols 0
Kill yourself.