Today, my wife was putting her finger in my bellybutton and making overly sexual noises. I thought this was all fun and games until I realized she was actually into this. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my wife has been super into sex lately, she even let me try some of the stuff she said no to before, and even surprised me with some of the kinky stuff she’s always wanted to try. Sounds great, right? Nope. Turns out she was overcompensating from the guilt of also fucking my coworker. FML
Today, as my wife and I were getting intimate, I thought I would try a little "dirty talk". I whispered in her ear that I would "dick her down good". She couldn't stop laughing. FML
Today, my husband discovered poking me in my belly button makes me have to pee, sometimes it's uncontrollable and happens immediately. He thinks it's hilarious and decided it's his new favorite game. FML
Today, while getting it on with my wife, I started to talk dirty to her. She started laughing. When I asked her if she wanted me to stop, she just kept on laughing. FML
Today, my wife figured that a good foreplay move would be to rub MY underwear in MY face. FML
Today, my husband was trying to be sexy, and asked me if I wanted to sit on his "Belly Finger". Major mood kill. FML
Today, I found out my girlfriend has been putting boogers in my belly button when I don't pay attention to her while we watch tv. FML
Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to stick her finger up my ass during sex. I screamed like a little girl and barely managed to finish. Afterward, she said, 'Now you know how it feels.' FML
Today, I was giving my wife a massage. That led to some very intense and passionate love making, and she told me that has been the best sex we’ve had. Next thing I know, she's upset and yelling at me about how massages always lead to sex. She was asking for it. Literally. FML
Today, my new girlfriend and I finally did the deed. I also realized today that I have a strange kink. An outie belly button. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
music_is_life22 12
Well everybody has their fetishes XD
krad204 21
Well someone likes to put things in holes, watch out OP.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (119)
music_is_life22 12
Well everybody has their fetishes XD
thisiscool19 14
#1 stole what I was going to say
Welshite 40
#6: He didn't steal what you were going to say. He merely typed it faster.
Wyaru 9
You could still say it, it would just be mildly irritating.
incoherentrmblr 22
To each their own & don't ask, don't tell...
foxwasalamb 24
i think they told all of us though
the_Jessicaaa 11
I have a belly button and nipple fetish lol!!
BvbArmy_0 18
@83 What part of don't ask don't tell do you not understand?
BigBamBoom 15
Everybody has his/her own fetish*. Everybody has their fetishes is grammatically incorrect. Everybody is singular. God dammit its not even my 3rd language.
BvbArmy_0 18
#94 SHUT UP GRAMMAR POLICE
BigBamBoom 15
I have lived in New Zealand and now I live in England. All I see is people murdering their mother-tongue on a daily basis. No wonder selfie made it to the dictionary. Looking at the thumbs down it is very clear how people would rather bury the facts then try to learn from them.
Spinofanatic 5
*than
Deetz_Meerkat 2
"Their" can be used for a singular when referring to someone who's gender is not known or traditional pronouns (he, she) do not fit.
krad204 21
Well someone likes to put things in holes, watch out OP.
JMichael 26
I picture OP's wife being into Femdom.
OysterPearls 33
At least she hasn't bought a strap on... yet.
amisenho 11
It sounds like a case of penis envy.
mete_orito 34
OP has to watch his back just in case... ah and avoid dropping the soap while he's taking a shower.
mominzed 19
#17 Or so you think...
NoNamedGuy 9
As long as she is happy, where is the problem?
cathrope 10
I agree.
pessimistprime 4
OP is obviously not into it. Thats the problem.
penguin2000 2
Yea there's no problem with belly button rape
marzipanimal 15
Rape jokes aren't funny.
1two3four5six 23
if one of them isn't into it, the other should respect them enough to stop.
Echoa21 18
#66 they're kinda funny
mete_orito 34
It is cool if this fetish is only limited to the hole in your belly.
BvbArmy_0 18
Watch out, she may be a lesbian if she likes playing her fingers in holes
Kielnmsoftly 26
#35 Can you feel it now Mr. Crabs? In your belly button Mr. Crabs.
dreamweaver1227 11
You should experiment with this with her, OP.
KittenSandwich 9
*cleveland voice* oh that's nasty
jerryj 27
*Alvin the Chipmunk voice* Shut up
cathrope 10
Was thinking more of Peanuts voice from Jeff Dunham :-)
awkwardology 23
Whenever somebody says that, my mind instantly goes to the flash video "Horse Pop" that went viral a few years ago
Wizardo 34
Everyone has a fetish, some can't stomach it, some can. Its all about if it gets you off, digest that.
cadillacgal79 32
Pun intended?
Soulsbane96_fml 11
There's two, so I'd say they were intentional.
simplysarcastics 26
#29 *intestinal (since we are having pun time
football98_fml 20
Some people just have strange fetishes
Futacy 30
Eh, people like what they like.
makersmarkmike 17
Everybody needs a finger in the button once in awhile!
simplysarcastics 26
Read to fast and saw butt in place of button. I was nothing short of appalled. lol
wtffml1979 22
So you read, "she stuck her finger into my bellybutt"?
ostfaiz 18
this is an indication OP, she might want her holes fulfilled .. ;)
titandesu 14
i think the indication happened a while before this seeing as they're married.....
RedPillSucks 33
I think she wants to fill his hole
whenitdidhappen 14
you are funny!!