Today, my love life is so pathetic that when I got a sample of cologne in the mail, I kept sniffing it just to remind myself what a guy smells like. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I realized that I get turned on by my girlfriend's perfume. My mother started using the same one. FML
Today, my boyfriend was continuously telling me how great my best friend smelled the other night and how I should wear some perfume that smelled like that. I have the same exact perfume and have been wearing it for months. FML
Today, my loving fiancé informed me that my new perfume makes me smell like a urinal cake. FML
Today, I had to walk through the women's perfume section to get to my normal aftershave. A woman was trying out a perfume, which she squirted on herself and me. You can imagine the afternoon I had to endure after I got home to my wife and she could smell "some slut's scent" all over me. FML
Today, I lied at a store when the checkout person told me the cologne I was buying was for men. I told him it was for my boyfriend. I haven't had a boyfriend in 2 years, I just wanted it to smell like one. FML
Today, I realized that it wasn't my science partner that smelled bad, it was me. How? The guy I have a crush on handed me a stick of deodorant and said, "Please use it." FML
Today, I showered with my favorite soaps, and I used my favorite perfumes and lotions too. I layered my scents to get a nice fruity, girly scent, which helps boosts my confidence. My husband walked in the bedroom when I was done and said that it smelled like cheesy garlic bread. FML
Today, I discovered my new plug-in air freshener smells exactly like my ex-boyfriend's cologne. My friends noticed this, and nobody will believe me when I say it smelled different on the scratch-and-sniff. Now I'm considered a creep. A nostalgic, obsessed creep. FML
Today, I was going to attempt to compliment my girlfriend, I planned on telling her that she smelled really nice. In a loving tone, I confidently told her, "Baby, you have a certain stench to you." FML
Today, I was walking into class when the guy i like walked in and said "Gross it smells like grandma in here. What, did someone bathe in their perfume today?" I was the only girl in the room and I just bought new perfume. I thought I smelled good, apparently I didn't. FML
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Top comments
spursunited 19
Smell random strangers on the bus/subway and when they ask what you're doing stare them straight in the eyes and take the biggest breath possible without breaking eye contact and slowly back away while whispering, "you smell different when you're awake..."
SauceySarah 30
I don't blame you. Guy's cologne smells absolutely incredible if it's the good kind.
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Comments (58)
DeathofCareBear 21
You could always just sniff guys when they walk by and act like it never happened
Swandive235 27
*Sharp inhale*
krazayman 18
i dont know about you guys but that would be really creepy. you wont make guy friends doing that
MyGFisaturd 23
Plenty of the fish in the sea OP, you'll find someone :)
SauceySarah 30
I don't blame you. Guy's cologne smells absolutely incredible if it's the good kind.
Mossyoak_kw 28
Agreed! I would sit and smell that cologne sample for as long as possible and feel no shame.
lulinator 40
I love the smell of cologne. I've complimented several random men on how great they smell. They usually wind up giving me their number, which I find creepy. Even though I'm the creepy one for sniffing them.
spursunited 19
Smell random strangers on the bus/subway and when they ask what you're doing stare them straight in the eyes and take the biggest breath possible without breaking eye contact and slowly back away while whispering, "you smell different when you're awake..."
expertsmilee 26
Watchin' out for you in public...
BrutalEater 15
what kind of drugs do you take?
TheBlazinAsian 9
The good kind
Swandive235 27
I shit you not, i dared one of my friends to do that. And the women he was starring at hit him with her purse.
steelersfan501 17
Don't worry, the perfect guy will come by soon. Don't worry. You will find someone just keep looking. :)
EatUrGreens 20
People tell me that when I look for jobs and fail the interview, not for boyfriends xD
LilMissCanadian 22
#singlelife FYL
Thoricsteam20 24
You'll get someone eventually you just gotta believe
limegreenpoopie 31
You need to go out.
AkBunny907 18
I can totally relate to this, but don't worry OP! It'll get better:)
rileyrae0000 23
I don't blame you. A good cologne can be so pleasing to sniff