Today, I showered with my favorite soaps, and I used my favorite perfumes and lotions too. I layered my scents to get a nice fruity, girly scent, which helps boosts my confidence. My husband walked in the bedroom when I was done and said that it smelled like cheesy garlic bread. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my husband bought a luxury soap that smells like lemons. Now, every time I wash my private parts in the shower, it smells like a special at Red Lobster. FML
Today, I had to walk through the women's perfume section to get to my normal aftershave. A woman was trying out a perfume, which she squirted on herself and me. You can imagine the afternoon I had to endure after I got home to my wife and she could smell "some slut's scent" all over me. FML
Today, after days of being too sick to leave my house, I went to get some medicine. While picking out cough drops, an old man leaned over and said, "You smell quite delicious today." I haven't showered and the only "perfume" I'm wearing is VapoRub. FML
Today, my loving fiancé informed me that my new perfume makes me smell like a urinal cake. FML
Today, I was walking into class when the guy i like walked in and said "Gross it smells like grandma in here. What, did someone bathe in their perfume today?" I was the only girl in the room and I just bought new perfume. I thought I smelled good, apparently I didn't. FML
Today, I was going to attempt to compliment my girlfriend, I planned on telling her that she smelled really nice. In a loving tone, I confidently told her, "Baby, you have a certain stench to you." FML
Today, my love life is so pathetic that when I got a sample of cologne in the mail, I kept sniffing it just to remind myself what a guy smells like. FML
Today, I realized that I get turned on by my girlfriend's perfume. My mother started using the same one. FML
Today, when I woke up, I got into the bath that my boyfriend had prepared for me. I particularly appreciated its smell, so I asked him what he'd used. "I couldn't find the usual bath salts you use, so I just used what I could." It's official, I've taken a Alka-Seltzer flavored bath. FML
Today, I walked in the bathroom and smelled a disgusting cheesy smell. I looked at the tub and my boyfriend was furiously scrubbing under his toenails with a nail brush. FML
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Top comments
Hangryko 32
I can't stand it when people douse themselves in strong scents like perfume, cologne, hairspray, etc.; it triggers my asthma and allergies. Scents don't just affect you. YDI
bigredmonkeybutt 30
I love the smell of cheesy garlic bread.
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Comments (6)
RichardPencil 32
Douche that stanky pussy!
Hangryko 32
I can't stand it when people douse themselves in strong scents like perfume, cologne, hairspray, etc.; it triggers my asthma and allergies. Scents don't just affect you. YDI
bigredmonkeybutt 30
I love the smell of cheesy garlic bread.
ODBeefalo 10
yeah, I mean I get the problem... but I don't see it as a problem. who doesn't love cheesy garlic bread, or even uncheesy garlic bread.
Crowned Sataness 12
just use a body spray. you sound so high maintenance and my asthma would hate you
noonereally 6
Hot fresh cheesy garlic bread hot out of the oven? Yes please. Fruit...nah
IHaveThePower 18
If your husband routinely mixes up scents and flavors like this, you might want to have him see an ENT. Sometimes the bones in your nose can grow in strange shapes and alter your sense of smell and taste--they can also trap germs and give you repeat sinus infections, so getting checked will help a lot.