Today, my girlfriend said that while she was playing volleyball, her whole life flashed before her eyes. According to her grandmother, my girlfriend is now psychic. She completely believes it. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Her mom who had passed away years ago told her that I was cheating on her, telepathically. FML
Today, my girlfriend woke up in the middle of the night, crying. When I asked her why, she said that she had a dream where we were getting married. FML
Today, my mom reached the lowest point of her midlife crisis. She convinced herself she's psychic and grounded me for something she "knows" I'm going to do. FML
I keep mine hidden
Today, while my girlfriend is in hospital, I'm left at home with her mom. What I didn't know is that her mom's medication makes her do strange things. I learned that right away when she took a seat next to me, completely naked, on the couch. My girlfriend's mom is my grandmother's age. FML
Today, I found out that my whole family thinks my girlfriend is imaginary. I sent her a text in front of them telling her that. She never responded. FML
You can't hurry love
Today, my grandma wasn't feeling well, so I went to her house to check on her. After about 20 minutes, I knew she was feeling better when she looked at me and said, "So, do you have a boyfriend yet? I pray every night that I get to live long enough to see you with a boyfriend." FML
Ghost in the machine
Today, my mother told me that my dead grandmother speaks to her. How? When she's thinking of her while brushing her teeth, her electric toothbrush will suddenly stop buzzing and this tells her her mother is communicating with her. FML
Today, I was cuddling my girlfriend. The TV was on behind me, with some kind of girl's basketball game playing. When I stared into my girlfriend's eyes, she accused me of trying to check out the girls by looking at their reflection in her eyes. FML
Loner
Today, I realized my girlfriend has way more friends than I do. How did I realize this? She called me to tell me she was at the beach with her friends, and how much fun she was having. I was playing WoW in my room, and my friends don't answer my texts. FML
Watch your step
Today, while at a football game, I had my arm around my girlfriend. We were really close and I was just about to kiss her when suddenly her phone rang. It was her dad, telling her he's watching. FML
Top comments
stevenJB 25
Did she happen to take a spike to the head when that happened? Like really hard?
BrookieAnn 19
I see great relationship troubles in your future....ooooooo;)
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (87)
alluringtatas 7
What a gentleman you are, calling her a crazy bitch. What a catch you must be.
NeinKittenz 20
That comment was bad and you should feel ba- humped to death by angry FMLers
Zebediabolical 45
Maybe you should try and convince her that EVERY day is Steak-and-a-******* day! She's apparently really gullible.
gnattine 11
Well, hell, ya never know.
Ibeatmyself 3
Play the lottery
Obey_StudBoii 23
You're an asshole for calling your gf a bitch. Don't question someone's intuition if they seen their life flash before their eyes or if they can speak to the dead (my ex can, she's a medium) . What I'm saying here is you shouldn't be making fun out of this. There are many people who are born with gifts, then there are some who get them later in life. Like myself, I can sometimes read someone's mind (don't comment with some bs "read mine" BECAUSE IT HAS TO BE IN PERSON. I can also feel when something is wrong but I can't place who it is or the person.
Voij 16
There are a couple of explanations for these phenomena, though. Talking to the dead: Usually saying things that people expect a dead person to say. Relatively easy if you know the deceased well enough and can mimic their behaviour/statements. Reading someone's mind: There are only so many things a person can think about, so it's obvious that you'd sometimes be able to know what a person is thinking. (Body language can assist a whole lot here aswell.) Feel that something is wrong: Two major explanations here. First one is body language, second one is simply chance. (If you think something is wrong 10 times and it happens once, you'll believe that you had supernatural powers that allowed you to know of it.) Now, I'm not gonna say that people who state these things are lying. There are a lot who are fully convinced and would bet their life on the fact that they can read minds and talk to deceased people. Most of the time, however, they just don't know that they actually can't. (Especially the "talking to dead people" thing.) If you want sources for any of these explanations and sufficient proof that nobody can talk to the dead, take a look at science. Most of it will cover these things quite well.
Obey_StudBoii 23
Look! I know what's real and what isn't real. She didn't say it for the hell of it or because she felt the need to. No. She said what she said because I knew for a fact, she was talking with my grandma. Now my grandma knew stuff about me my ex didn't, because I hadn't mentioned any of it to her. I know what happened that night. Reading someones mind: you don't get where I'm coming from do you? Are you trying to tell me that everything I'm saying isn't true? If you are it would be a waste of your time because I know what's REAL. You're over there saying it's "Body language, and it can assist here as well". I call bs on that, and your reply to my comment. 1: You don't know me. 2: Half of which you say "Body Language" is full of crap.
Voij 16
I'm fairly certain that I did mention that you quite possibly are not lying, because you firmly believe what you're saying. That still doesn't make it true, though. (Think of the people who were convinced that the Earth was flat.) And if you're curious about the "mind reading" part, there are a lot of experts and professionals who are able to read most people like a book. That's not because they have superpowers, but rather because they have extensive background knowledge of these people, can estimate what a person is most likely to think at a certain time especially when faced with certain topics, and can read their emotional state from things like body language(including how they stand, how nervous they are, color of their face, etc.).
DeBoss 8
Some people are just that naive... And usually they are very sweet too.... Funny how that goes hand in hand......
Obey_StudBoii 23
If that's how you feel then more power to you. I'm just stating the truth. My ex knew nothing about my grandma and when we did in fact have a session she said things only my grandma knew that no one else knew. So thank you because your comment shows you don't believe in the "Supernatural"
Obey_StudBoii 23
#59 Sorry my comment i made before was in reply to my original comment on here that someone replied on.
kelseeinez 10
Lol run now
mattlw 25
To the gas station to buy a lottery ticket.
RedPillSucks 33
OP, I believe you misspelled psycho
mrd97 10
Is she blonde?