Today, my girlfriend came over to my place unannounced. She slapped me in the face, said, "You son of a bitch." and stormed off. I have no idea what that was for. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She slapped me in the face, stormed out and won't answer my calls. What the hell? FML
Today, I went to a club with my girlfriend and her buddies. An hour in, I saw her making out with a guy on the dance floor, so I confronted her. She stormed off to the bar and said something to her friend, who then came over and angrily slapped me across the face. Yeah, I'm confused too. FML
Today, I spotted my girlfriend in a store. She didn't notice me, so I went behind her, put my hands over her eyes, and said "Guess who." I got an elbow to the groin and mace to the face. While I was rolling on the ground in pain, she simply said, "Serves you right" and walked away. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I got into a huge fight. She kicked me out of the apartment and told me to never come back. Devastated, I waited outside of the apartment door for hours, hoping she'd reconsider. I ended up falling asleep. I woke up to her foot stomping on me, screaming, "I meant it!" FML
Today, while my girlfriend and I were making out, she went to fix the pillow behind her head and punched me straight in the face. FML
Today, I drove three hours to surprise my girlfriend, who I hadn't seen in three weeks. When she opened the door, she gasped, told me to fuck off, and slammed the door in my face. FML
Today, my girlfriend woke me with a surprise up on my birthday. Unfortunately, it was her screaming at the top of her lungs and punching me in the face because of a nightmare. FML
Today, I went to the mall with my girlfriend to buy some new clothes, and I turned around to give her a quick kiss. My lips were half-way to "her" face when I saw instead the face of another lady. She slapped me. My girlfriend was standing next to me, very pissed off. FML
Today, my girlfriend snuck up behind me to cover my eyes and play "guess who." The second her hands touched my face, I grabbed her, twisted her wrists, and kneed her to the floor out of instinct. FML
Today, I asked my wife for a kiss. She snarled, "I'm your WIFE, just fucking kiss me! You don't have to ask!" Later, I went in for a kiss and she slapped me, then yelled that it was my fault for "getting in her face." FML
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Top comments
watermelon15 35
This could go either way... I wonder if you did do something..
snoopy325 23
Girls have an uncanny way of figuring things out... And being psychotic. Good luck figuring out which it is!
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Comments (132)
Soundslikeothers 15
"Well if you don't know I'm not going to tell you"- her probably
Brandi_Faith 34
I hate when girls are mad at a guy and they don't tell them why they're mad at them or what the guy did wrong. The guy can't fix it or learn from it if he doesn't even know what he did. How do they expect him not to do it again if he isn't even aware he did it in the first place?
BvbArmy_0 18
Do you have a twin brother by chance?
giantsfan2010 23
You probably liked another girls picture on Facebook or Instagram.
turdoblast 21
all I can say is good luck bro
qdawg06 23
Maybe she just thinks your mom is a bitch....
marcelmg 10
Don't worry. It's just proof that she is a real woman? You just never know what sets them off.
zman64 9
MEN: We don't know what we did!
brandoneyez1 25
Did you get her pregnant?
skittyskatbrat 19
Yeah...girls that play those mind-games and shit are exactly that. He needs to find a woman. You know, someone that's grown up :P
skittyskatbrat 19
Well, being pregnant would explain some of the irrationality if she's hormonal AND being stupid about it. But it takes two to tango for her to get that way! Even if it's pregnancy hormones... you don't slap people.
skittyskatbrat 19
Argh. That one about the girl was SUPPOSED to after #52.
WolfyGrace 24
I was thinking the same thing. Perhaps OP accidentally got her pregnant without knowing.
DenverTyrrell 13
For your sake I really hope you have done nothing wrong and she has made a mistake, good luck I hope you two can figure it out!
sarah_baby22 15
Well you better find out soon! Us girls are pretty crazy sometimes...