Today, my girlfriend came over to my place unannounced. She slapped me in the face, said, "You son of a bitch." and stormed off. I have no idea what that was for. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She slapped me in the face, stormed out and won't answer my calls. What the hell? FML
Today, I went to a club with my girlfriend and her buddies. An hour in, I saw her making out with a guy on the dance floor, so I confronted her. She stormed off to the bar and said something to her friend, who then came over and angrily slapped me across the face. Yeah, I'm confused too. FML
Today, I spotted my girlfriend in a store. She didn't notice me, so I went behind her, put my hands over her eyes, and said "Guess who." I got an elbow to the groin and mace to the face. While I was rolling on the ground in pain, she simply said, "Serves you right" and walked away. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I got into a huge fight. She kicked me out of the apartment and told me to never come back. Devastated, I waited outside of the apartment door for hours, hoping she'd reconsider. I ended up falling asleep. I woke up to her foot stomping on me, screaming, "I meant it!" FML
Today, while my girlfriend and I were making out, she went to fix the pillow behind her head and punched me straight in the face. FML
Today, I drove three hours to surprise my girlfriend, who I hadn't seen in three weeks. When she opened the door, she gasped, told me to fuck off, and slammed the door in my face. FML
Today, my girlfriend woke me with a surprise up on my birthday. Unfortunately, it was her screaming at the top of her lungs and punching me in the face because of a nightmare. FML
Today, I went to the mall with my girlfriend to buy some new clothes, and I turned around to give her a quick kiss. My lips were half-way to "her" face when I saw instead the face of another lady. She slapped me. My girlfriend was standing next to me, very pissed off. FML
Today, my girlfriend snuck up behind me to cover my eyes and play "guess who." The second her hands touched my face, I grabbed her, twisted her wrists, and kneed her to the floor out of instinct. FML
Today, I asked my wife for a kiss. She snarled, "I'm your WIFE, just fucking kiss me! You don't have to ask!" Later, I went in for a kiss and she slapped me, then yelled that it was my fault for "getting in her face." FML
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Top comments
watermelon15 35
This could go either way... I wonder if you did do something..
snoopy325 23
Girls have an uncanny way of figuring things out... And being psychotic. Good luck figuring out which it is!
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Comments (132)
spikey818 9
Maybe it's the fact that you didn't do something,
Brandi_Faith 34
So true. It's very possible you didn't do something that you were supposed to Op. Try and see if you forgot a date, an important birthday, or if you were supposed to be somewhere? Good luck, but if you can't figure out what it is that you've done wrong and she won't tell you than I would seriously suggest you end the relationship. You don't want to be with someone that plays mind games. You could spend half your relationship with her mad at you for something that you aren't even aware of.
False_Stupidity 42
Even if you ask, her likely responses are either "You know" or "If you don't know, I'm not telling." It's even possible that you did nothing wrong but she thinks that you did. It's just one of those things that you will likely never know.
NodakN8V 25
Ah hell good luck with this one bro....women have a way of finding a Delorian and bringing up the past for no reason what so ever. Just remember " Admit Nothing - Deny Everything "
leiwei 13
So let's just write about it instead of going to figure out or ask her what's wrong. Haaaa nice.
sadistmonkey 19
How do you know it's "instead of"?
metalcrazed 21
I don't think it's a good idea to follow someone who is hitting him.
skittyskatbrat 19
Erm...she slapped you. No. End of relationship. That's it. At least you know NOW before you gave her a ring or something! Sorry, man. :(
Algorithm 24
This. There is no okay reason to hit your partner unless it's self-defense.
worldclassrager 41
Questionable statement...follow up...
xKai_Axelx 12
because she's a girl
metalcrazed 21
You shouldn't stay in a relationship where you are being hit. Regardless of your gender there is no excuse for her slapping you. That is abuse and you deserve better.
zombiekiller52 24
Men we don't know what we did.
fwongraven 10
Surprise her with an unannounced visit from the police for domestic violence.