Today, my girlfriend came over to my place unannounced. She slapped me in the face, said, "You son of a bitch." and stormed off. I have no idea what that was for. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She slapped me in the face, stormed out and won't answer my calls. What the hell? FML
Today, I went to a club with my girlfriend and her buddies. An hour in, I saw her making out with a guy on the dance floor, so I confronted her. She stormed off to the bar and said something to her friend, who then came over and angrily slapped me across the face. Yeah, I'm confused too. FML
Today, I spotted my girlfriend in a store. She didn't notice me, so I went behind her, put my hands over her eyes, and said "Guess who." I got an elbow to the groin and mace to the face. While I was rolling on the ground in pain, she simply said, "Serves you right" and walked away. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I got into a huge fight. She kicked me out of the apartment and told me to never come back. Devastated, I waited outside of the apartment door for hours, hoping she'd reconsider. I ended up falling asleep. I woke up to her foot stomping on me, screaming, "I meant it!" FML
Today, while my girlfriend and I were making out, she went to fix the pillow behind her head and punched me straight in the face. FML
Today, I drove three hours to surprise my girlfriend, who I hadn't seen in three weeks. When she opened the door, she gasped, told me to fuck off, and slammed the door in my face. FML
Today, my girlfriend woke me with a surprise up on my birthday. Unfortunately, it was her screaming at the top of her lungs and punching me in the face because of a nightmare. FML
Today, I went to the mall with my girlfriend to buy some new clothes, and I turned around to give her a quick kiss. My lips were half-way to "her" face when I saw instead the face of another lady. She slapped me. My girlfriend was standing next to me, very pissed off. FML
Today, my girlfriend snuck up behind me to cover my eyes and play "guess who." The second her hands touched my face, I grabbed her, twisted her wrists, and kneed her to the floor out of instinct. FML
Today, I asked my wife for a kiss. She snarled, "I'm your WIFE, just fucking kiss me! You don't have to ask!" Later, I went in for a kiss and she slapped me, then yelled that it was my fault for "getting in her face." FML
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Top comments
watermelon15 35
This could go either way... I wonder if you did do something..
snoopy325 23
Girls have an uncanny way of figuring things out... And being psychotic. Good luck figuring out which it is!
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Comments (132)
beccarey9 17
You know what you did.
Pyrithium 8
You probably deserved it. The woman is always right in the relationship.
BeepBeepSwerve 9
lol like you'd know how it'sl ike being in a relationship
dfair1987 16
i never understood why women think it's okay to hit a guy if he makes them mad, but it's wrong when a guy does it. Abuse is abuse doesn't matter gender or size.
infinix_fml 5
see I want to say fyl but once you find out what it was for it will probably be a ydi
Tannasgh 22
It's a well documented feature in the current version of the Girlfriend 2.0 Software...
ManateeRex 14
Women, can't live with them, can't have heterosexual sex without them.
CryoShock 14
Maybe she was actually cheating on you, and found out that the guy that she was cheating on you with was cheating on someone else, too. Maybe she got you both mixed up.
CryoShock 14
Was cheating on her too*. Guess I typed that too fast :|
BeepBeepSwerve 9
what the hell...that doesn't make any sense
blindkid1790 12
sounds like for play to me.
youdare12 2
dicks
JakeAintFake 7
If you wanna try and fix things with her which I'm pretty sure you wanna just try visiting her and apologise buy her something nice or whatever and then ask her what you done wrong Hopefully it would work
dfair1987 16
Apologize for what? If the roles were reversed would you be saying apologize? I'm sorry but abuse is abuse .
BeepBeepSwerve 9
oh look someone hit me, so the next thing I'll do is I'm gonna apologize and buy her things that she doesn't deserve..