Today, my girlfriend called me a lazy pig. To prove her wrong, I decided to go lift some weights. A few reps in, my arm cracked and my first reaction was to squeal like a pig. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend and I were play-fighting. I managed to pin him down and win. He saw my grin, snorted, and bitterly said I'd only won because, "let's face it, you're a bit of a porker, eh babe?" FML
Today, I went with my girlfriend to the gym for the first time. I knew I was in bad shape, but I bet her that I could lift more than her. Not only did I get my ass handed to me by a 5', 115lbs girl in front of the entire gym, I also have to attend Zumba in bright pink spandex. FML
Today, I was working out at the gym. A very attractive girl was watching me work out, so feeling like a stud, I tried to lift a really heavy weight. I failed, got trapped, and watched helplessly as she walked away laughing. FML
Today, I sprained an arm muscle while pretending to lift weights. FML
Today, I was feeling down because I always think that I'm overweight. My boyfriend tried to prove me wrong by lifting me up. I threw his back out. FML
Today, my girlfriend thought she was stronger than me so we arm wrestled. She won. I used both hands. FML
Today, while working out in the gym, I spotted a very attractive girl. I decided to pick up the heaviest dumbbell to show off how much I could curl. She ended up driving me to the hospital because I burst into tears after tearing up my bicep and deltoid. FML
Today, at the gym I loaded way too much weight on the bench press. Halfway through my set, I got stuck with the bar on my chest, squealing like a squeezed rubber duck until a stranger rescued me. FML
Today, I went to the gym for the first time in months. Feeling pumped, I grabbed what I thought was a light dumbbell. It wasn’t. I dropped it on my toe and screamed so loud that the gym bros around me stopped mid-workout to stare at me. FML
Today, I tried to impress my wife by doing a bunch of push-ups, despite having a bad shoulder. She told me my form sucks and that I'm an idiot. Now I can barely move my arm and I'm going to have to get it fixed. FML
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Top comments
siickman 7
Wtf... Who squels like a pig when their arm cracks....
llamafish 25
See, she was right. You really are a pig.
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Comments (113)
loserman67 36
If the cloven hoof fits....wear it!
canzonetta 16
So why lift weights? You could have done the dishes or made the bed to prove her wrong..
hamtaro331 0
Women...you can't live with them... And you can't live without them
deplpre 1
She called you lazy and your response was to lift weights? How about help around the house or go grocery shopping? Getting off the couch and trying to lift weights would not impress any woman.
rattusrattus 19
It's bascially the kind of logic that my Dad uses. It does work (internally), but there's about eight or nine factors that haven't been considered when forming the conclusion.
Awsumuzzie 12
That's the weirdest way to prove you're not lazy. That's like, "you're fat!"... "I'll show you otherwise! Watch me write this well constructed essay!"
Sickkid97 5
Dumbass
NHLbound22 8
I would like to point out that 52 is correct. There are many skinny people out there that get called lazy on the sole basis that they do not go to the gym. This being said however, skinny people can also be fit with out going to the gym Hope that makes better sense to you 56
LilKriminal 0
If you squeal when you crack a bone, then id hate to hear what animal noise you during sex
vampiresam9097 5
This made my morning, thanks OP! No suicidal lunatic today!
LilKriminal 0
I forgot the word "make" in my #62 comment