Today, my girlfriend called me a lazy pig. To prove her wrong, I decided to go lift some weights. A few reps in, my arm cracked and my first reaction was to squeal like a pig. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend and I were play-fighting. I managed to pin him down and win. He saw my grin, snorted, and bitterly said I'd only won because, "let's face it, you're a bit of a porker, eh babe?" FML
Today, I went with my girlfriend to the gym for the first time. I knew I was in bad shape, but I bet her that I could lift more than her. Not only did I get my ass handed to me by a 5', 115lbs girl in front of the entire gym, I also have to attend Zumba in bright pink spandex. FML
Today, I was working out at the gym. A very attractive girl was watching me work out, so feeling like a stud, I tried to lift a really heavy weight. I failed, got trapped, and watched helplessly as she walked away laughing. FML
Today, I sprained an arm muscle while pretending to lift weights. FML
Today, I was feeling down because I always think that I'm overweight. My boyfriend tried to prove me wrong by lifting me up. I threw his back out. FML
Today, my girlfriend thought she was stronger than me so we arm wrestled. She won. I used both hands. FML
Today, while working out in the gym, I spotted a very attractive girl. I decided to pick up the heaviest dumbbell to show off how much I could curl. She ended up driving me to the hospital because I burst into tears after tearing up my bicep and deltoid. FML
Today, at the gym I loaded way too much weight on the bench press. Halfway through my set, I got stuck with the bar on my chest, squealing like a squeezed rubber duck until a stranger rescued me. FML
Today, I went to the gym for the first time in months. Feeling pumped, I grabbed what I thought was a light dumbbell. It wasn’t. I dropped it on my toe and screamed so loud that the gym bros around me stopped mid-workout to stare at me. FML
Today, I tried to impress my wife by doing a bunch of push-ups, despite having a bad shoulder. She told me my form sucks and that I'm an idiot. Now I can barely move my arm and I'm going to have to get it fixed. FML
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Top comments
siickman 7
Wtf... Who squels like a pig when their arm cracks....
llamafish 25
See, she was right. You really are a pig.
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Comments (113)
Jennfloyd 2
Just clean the house!
smithra9172002 5
Find another girlfriend. This one obviously doesn't much of you and is probably cheating on you anyway.
McNerdyNerd 8
She called you a lazy pig? Wow...so, even if you are, you should probably talk to her about the way she talks to you..and you should watch how you talk to her if you do the same. Insulting each other REALLY isn't a great way to be in a relationship..not a good one anyway. Trust and understanding ;)
MissHayleyJames 7
Well if you went in and tried to curl 50s in each hand without doing weights before or in a really long time, duh something is going to go wrong. You've got to start small and work up to it .
mman454 5
She probably meant this in terms of doing work around the house. So you just made your self look worse there.
tim732 7
Pussy
Platfoot 0
there is this guy at my school. he screams like a pig when you wave at him
bubo_fml 11
'Deliverance-The Workout edition!'
mbrooks5110 0
1: you should watch you're weight 2: your parent should like you for who you are I would never try to change my husband.
hoonyer 17
"That'll do pig"