Today, my girlfriend called me a lazy pig. To prove her wrong, I decided to go lift some weights. A few reps in, my arm cracked and my first reaction was to squeal like a pig. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend and I were play-fighting. I managed to pin him down and win. He saw my grin, snorted, and bitterly said I'd only won because, "let's face it, you're a bit of a porker, eh babe?" FML
Today, I went with my girlfriend to the gym for the first time. I knew I was in bad shape, but I bet her that I could lift more than her. Not only did I get my ass handed to me by a 5', 115lbs girl in front of the entire gym, I also have to attend Zumba in bright pink spandex. FML
Today, I was working out at the gym. A very attractive girl was watching me work out, so feeling like a stud, I tried to lift a really heavy weight. I failed, got trapped, and watched helplessly as she walked away laughing. FML
Today, I sprained an arm muscle while pretending to lift weights. FML
Today, I was feeling down because I always think that I'm overweight. My boyfriend tried to prove me wrong by lifting me up. I threw his back out. FML
Today, my girlfriend thought she was stronger than me so we arm wrestled. She won. I used both hands. FML
Today, while working out in the gym, I spotted a very attractive girl. I decided to pick up the heaviest dumbbell to show off how much I could curl. She ended up driving me to the hospital because I burst into tears after tearing up my bicep and deltoid. FML
Today, at the gym I loaded way too much weight on the bench press. Halfway through my set, I got stuck with the bar on my chest, squealing like a squeezed rubber duck until a stranger rescued me. FML
Today, I went to the gym for the first time in months. Feeling pumped, I grabbed what I thought was a light dumbbell. It wasn’t. I dropped it on my toe and screamed so loud that the gym bros around me stopped mid-workout to stare at me. FML
Today, I tried to impress my wife by doing a bunch of push-ups, despite having a bad shoulder. She told me my form sucks and that I'm an idiot. Now I can barely move my arm and I'm going to have to get it fixed. FML
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Top comments
siickman 7
Wtf... Who squels like a pig when their arm cracks....
llamafish 25
See, she was right. You really are a pig.
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Comments (113)
llamafish 25
See, she was right. You really are a pig.
leprechaun23 15
UIf it acts like a pig and sounds like a pig it must be a pig
llamafish 25
Exactly! On the bright side, pigs don't sweat :)
thiscrazything 1
But they smell really bad.
marinus_fml 20
At least you didn't squeal like a lazy pig though. And I'm pretty sure either your elbow or shoulder cracked, arms don't just crack.
gojira666 7
See? Im not a lazy *SNAP hhreeeeeeeeeeeee
mwrc8man94 1
How did your arm crack? Are you all bone or something
Calyx_fml 22
Thanks for explaining the fml for us. We didn't get it.
SweetPerfectionn 3
I guess that's his 'soul animal'?
mootoo31 6
Squeal like a pig Bart
Driveshaft 5
You and Ned Beatty.
bunniex1 11
Your profile made my day :)
CantusVulpis 12
Aradia ;)
siickman 7
Wtf... Who squels like a pig when their arm cracks....
muzy 23
oh you'd be surprised to know how many people have that impulse.... not me though mhmm!
SookyTurner 4
Retards
CockAsian 14
19 - it's not good to talk about yourself like that.
urdirtyolduncle 15
I moo like a cow when my arm cracks.
shitidied 17
squel squel
klovemachine 24
oink!
uffiewuffie 0
OP, stop being an attention hogger
Zomg_Okay 27
That's rich, 31. Your comment has nothing to do with #3's comment, therefore you only posted it there so it'd be near the top of the comments screen. You can't really tell people not to go looking for attention.
princev3 4
OP is such a noob. Once, I was raiding Stormwind and got teamed up on by two guards. They crit for 12k each but you don't see me oinking. Gosh OP grow a sack and stop crying.
uffiewuffie 0
Excellent observation, #73. Except for one thing. You obviously commented just to get attention as well. Hypocrite
muzy 23
aaaaaannnd match point to #84. Congratulation sir, you've just won the internets.
Zomg_Okay 27
How was I commenting to get attention? I was commenting to point out you looking for attention, nothing more. If I was that concerned about attention, I'd be trying to get first comments and the like, not making legitimate replies to other people's posts.
uffiewuffie 0
Why would you do that anyway? Do you have anything better to do than comment something obvious just to make yourself sound smart and intelligent?
Zomg_Okay 27
Stupid question. If I had something better to be doing, I'd be doing that, wouldn't I?
Turock27 7
Reeeeeet!!!
Sandsh8rk 36
It doesn't mean you are lazy, though.
upyourzlolz 11
It doesn't. The major difference between OP and a pig is that you can't cut OP into thin strips of meat deliciousness. Well, legally, anyway.
CryMoreFMLs 15
35 - It's only illegal if the police find out... Muwhaha....
Hollandiscrazy 12
48 - Damn your picture goes a little too well with your photo. Shit's creaping me out.
llamafish 25
Wait, it's illegal? Whoops. Wish I had known that a bit earlier...
MagicallyFat 12
Why would you even do that? I'm going to assume you put alot of weight on… but if you are lazy and this is your first time lifting weights, you prob should understand it'll take a few months for you to perfect your form. Then you can gradually increase weights. Hope you get better Op
kittyx33 0
He could have not even put on weight. He could just not have gone to the gym. There are many guys that get called lazy, never gone to the gym a day in their lives but are still skinny. In shape? No. But skinny.
Awsumuzzie 12
52, do you not understand his comment or this fml? I'm very confused by you, young one.
Bladian 5
52 the person was talking about putting on weights. As in lifting. Reading comprehension is fun!
MizzErikaHart 8
Should have proved you weren't lazy by vacuuming or something.
Andr913 13
That's what I was thinking. Seriously, today is full of YDIs already with this guy, the guy who drank piss, and "I twitch when I hear the word penis" kid.
rocker_chick105 31
I have seen this one somewhere before.....
panda_bear0618 1
that's what spotters are for...
marinus_fml 20
Spotters don't magically make you immune to joint cracking.
buck33 14
I have a ripped picture too!
Hollandiscrazy 12
51 - Ripped from Google's I-try-to-be-funny-with-pictures-of-poor-and-black-kids page???
eb0ny 15
at least you tried to prove her wrong.....?
texashater75 16
They also fart a lot. But more importantly.....wrong FML.
texashater75 16
Never mind. My app posted this in the wrong place.
chouter21 10
Lol talk about an aphorism