Today, my girlfriend asked me if I could love anything more than her, and if so, what. I guess "bacon" was the wrong answer. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I asked my girlfriend why she can't treat me like the way I treat her. She said, "because you love me more than I love you." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were making out, holding hands, and he was playing with a strand of my hair. I thought the whole thing was very romantic. He then said he loved how my mouth tasted like bacon. FML
Today, my boyfriend was stroking my stomach and looking into my eyes. It was very romantic, until he grabbed my love handles and said, "Mmmm... bacon..." FML
Today, my girlfriend called me and asked what I was doing. I replied, "What I'm always doing." She couldn't think of anything besides eating. FML
Today, I asked my girlfriend what her favorite quality about me was. Her answer, "Your car." FML
Today, my girlfriend of 2 years broke up with me because I wouldn't make my senior quote, "I love my girlfriend more than anything." FML
Today, my girlfriend asked me if I loved her. I tried to be cute and romantic and responded with a quote from the Notebook, which I watched with her yesterday. After I said, "If you're a bird, I'm a bird," she broke up with me because I was "phony and unoriginal." FML
Today, I told my girlfriend that I'm a vegan. She replied, "So, you're allergic to meat?" FML
Today, my girlfriend asked me what I wanted for my birthday. Apparently “A threesome” is not the appropriate answer. FML
Today, my girlfriend asked me not to love her so much, so she doesn't have to try so hard to match my love for her. What the fuck? FML
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Top comments
Hollywoodgirl79 18
Although bacon is amazing and a direct gift from the gods, I think it's okay to lie and say that you don't love anything more than her in this instance
thatonegirlnic 10
Don't go bacon my heart
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Comments (201)
token_blackguy 18
Bacon is the right answer. You have the wrong girlfriend. .
AKAR2521 4
she should be happy you didnt say another girls name.
leprechaungirly 2
the only acceptable answer is your mother despite bacon being gods gift to humankind YDI
skyeyez9 25
What is the big deal with bacon? Yes it tastes good. But the obsession over it??? Its more like people say it just because its the popular thing to go crazy over. Two years from now, it will be something else.
YepThatsMeee 23
Yeah, bacon is totally a fad. In a few months you'll have to look on Ebay for a piece of uneaten bacon.
rikkidi 20
Bacon is very overrated...
RedPillSucks 33
#54 and #59 are blasphemers and will be burned in the firey pits of barbeque hell!
Reos_fml 3
Epicmealtime her ass.
fakedsincerity 32
tell her to stop fishing for compliments.
fuzz97 23
destroy bacon culture
blackychan63 12
one, she set him up and deserved it. two, he should have lied and said she is it. he deserved it as well.
will89pito 5
The right answer was pizza
Ins0mau 20
No! That was in the 90's. Now it's definitely bacon.