Today, My girlfriend and I were watching tv when suddenly one of our phones start going off. We both have the same phone and they were next to each other. She picks up the phone and reads the text message, "I wish you were here! I'd fuck you silly" She gets pissed and runs out. It was her phone. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I woke up, thinking it was going to be a good day. However, when I looked at my phone, I saw that my girlfriend had sent me an obscene number of angry messages, which are still coming in, because I forgot to say goodnight to her last night. FML
Today, while at church, I received a text from my girlfriend, saying, "It's not working. We're over." Not only was my phone not on silent mode, I was sitting directly beside my now ex-girlfriend. FML
Today, after weeks of my girlfriend moaning that I never go anywhere, I went out with some friends. An hour in, she started blowing up my phone. When I answered it, she was screaming in rage because I wasn't home to cook dinner. FML
Today, my girlfriend berated me for my "lack of communication skills", all while deeply engrossed with something on her phone. FML
Today, I got a text from a woman containing many naked pictures of her. Apparently she meant to send those to her boyfriend whose number is one digit from mine. The bad part? My girlfriend was using my phone when I received that message. FML
Today, while at a football game, I had my arm around my girlfriend. We were really close and I was just about to kiss her when suddenly her phone rang. It was her dad, telling her he's watching. FML
Today, my phone died while I was on the phone with my girlfriend. When I finally got a charger, I saw a text message from her. I'm now single. FML
Today, I thought I felt my cellphone vibrating. Turned out it was just my girlfriend letting out a vicious fart against my leg. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me through a text message. In retaliation, I started typing a long list of everything I hate about her. Just as I pressed the send button, she text me again saying "Just joking. You know I'd never leave you. Love you babe :)" FML
Today, I was getting sick of listening to the guy in the next room over getting nasty with some girl, so I called my girlfriend to see if she wanted to go get some food. Then I heard her phone ring. Through the wall. FML
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Top comments
zOMGitsdc 0
Hope your dumb girlfriend realized she made herself look retarded doing that.
genius_man16 1
What a cheating bitch! But hey, be glad you're rid of her.
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Comments (132)
ViCT0RiA_fml 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
haha! that's funny. (: omg, im first. yay! (thubs down if you suck) ;D
A83_fml 18
i hope she was a good F.. and otherwise you always have this: http://all-the-exgirlfriends.info/?uid=107034
silvermoonstar3 3
"thubs"? whatever. Anyways, the real worry should be that she *knew* it was her phone and pretended to be mad at you so she could go get laid by whoever sent it...
grumpyoldtroll 0
YDI FOR READING THIS COMMENT!
steeznuts 0
grumpyoldtroll is awesome
jbt420 0
thats was so cheap i clicked that link so you could unlock more pictures
emo_fail_child 0
WTF
Sydneyhehe 6
You might want to try being less desperate for attention and work on your second grade spelling skills. Good luck :)
zOMGitsdc 0
Hope your dumb girlfriend realized she made herself look retarded doing that.
inconvienentgurl 0
wow bitch move...she's cheating on u but gets pissed that some other girl wants u wen really its that some guy is trying to do her n she just made herself look like an ass... cheating hoes get on my nerves...they make those who dont cheat look bad n guys who cheat look better (.00001 % better)
Charlieeeeeeeeee 0
OUCH! What a ***** You deserve better than her :S
genius_man16 1
What a cheating bitch! But hey, be glad you're rid of her.
v1kt4r 13
who said anything about getting rid of her (today MY GIRLFRIEND...)
CDS09 0
she isnt necessarily cheating....she can just be stupid. I know guys who would do things like that to other guys just to mess with them....besides, because some guy wants to nail her doesnt mean she is letting him...he may just be straight forward.....or drunk.....or maybe she is a cheating *****. Either way I dont think you can say for sure.
genius_man16 1
hmmm, fair points. I am humbled :)
gonzolove 0
She's still a bitch for thinking it was his phone and getting all upset.
TheDrifter 24
She's likely just pissed op's silly questions are slowing her run to go put her good panties on and get outta there.
allmidnighteyes 11
She got pissed at you for thinking you were cheating, but she was the one who really was? You should pay a hipster a case of PBR to kick her in the twat.
iGreen_Day 0
Amen, sista.
mo_the_owl 0
HAHAHA FTW!
Polionixon 2
Listen bella, have you ever hit your cooder on a bike bar? That shit HURTS way worse then being punched in the boob ANY DAY!
DameGreyWulf 1
Isn't it "cooter"? Some women are more sensitive to boob punch than **** punt. Then again it all depends on where you are hit, and if you still have your hymen... lol
Plumppotato 3
bust her head with a lead pipe
theaaxis 27
The hymen doesn't go away guys...
tiggerdoc 14
Hipsters drink PBR? I thought that was just us rednecks. Lol
Trooth 13
oo that sucks. Well maybe you should be happy that she left because (and this is totally agreeing with #3) she's a cheater. But then again...why would she get mad if you got that text and she's cheating on you too. Maybe she planned the whole thing!
JustSoLost 8
-_-' She doesn't deserve you if she's cheating on you.
plexico 4
He doesn't deserve her if he wants to sit on his fat, pasty ass and watch TV, while some other dude across town wants to pleasure that fine lady.
Inked2009 0
Dumbass, the slutty bitch doesn't desereve him!
plexico 4
Fool! Lazy bastard doesn't deserve her!
plexico 4
That'll work, too, d_h_d!
johnnyredcorn 5
61- You're a ******* loser so shut up, and learn how to spell. Loser.
jdizzle1245 0
bowchickawowow
allmidnighteyes 11
brown chicken brown cowww oh what the hell #8 keeps alternating
OwMyToe 0
Oh wow. FYL :(
PeacockSHS 0
Well, YOUR life sucks. You're sure she ran out because she was pissed? Busteeddd.
Konrad_fml 0
Well I guess she ran out to get ****** silly.
lives_ppl 0
lol
_unknown_ 0
ahahahahaha