Today, my father, who I rarely see, drove 400 miles to my wedding. I was so happy to see him, until he got completely trashed at my reception, asked me where he could "score some weed" and told me what a bitch my mom was, and how I needed to lose weight. For over an hour. At my wedding. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my dad thought it would be appropriate to get drunk at my wedding and include in his father of the bride speech all the very bad things I did as a child, before I got the psychiatric help I needed. My in-laws were giving me death glares, and his nana yelled, “Shame on you!” at me. FML
Today, my dad got so drunk that he proposed to me. FML
Today, my dad told me he liked men. While he was making a drunken speech. At my wedding. FML
Today, despite his promise not to, my dad got completely shitfaced at my wedding reception. When we found him, he was passed out on the toilet with his pants down, penis out, and he’d shit all over himself, the toilet, and the floor. I thought I could trust him just this once, but now he’s dead to me. FML
Today, I went to my (now ex) boyfriend’s step-uncle’s wedding. He got absolutely wasted and kept talking about marrying me in front of his mom and step-dad, but was listing off who he would and wouldn’t invite, all in front of the people he wouldn’t invite. FML
Today, my mom got drunk and started crying at my after-wedding party, after promising she'd behave herself. She thinks my husband is an awful person who'll drag me into a life of sin, all because he has a tattoo and an ear piercing. FML
Today, I got married. My father saw this as a good time to give some solemn, heartfelt advice to my new husband: "That ring gets real heavy fast." I was standing right there. So was my mother. FML
Today, I found out that my father, who very recently lost his wife, decided that drunkenly hitting on my long-time boyfriend's mom was a good idea. FML
Today, my dad, who lives hours away, called and told me he was getting married. Today. As in this evening. Guess I'm not invited. FML
Today, I was the best man at a wedding and I was flirting with a cute bridesmaid. Then this old guy decides to give the newlyweds a toast. He made a crappy joke and barely anybody laughed. So I say to the girl, "Wow that sucked, who the hell does he think he is?" The girl replies, "That's my dad". FML
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Top comments
Inspired22 11
I'm so sorry. Try not to let him get to you. It's your special day! Remember next time, you do have the right to make him leave your parties...he really would have deserved that.
dramakat11 0
Did you tell him to go **** himself? Seriously, disown the jerk. How dare he ruin one of the most important occasions of your life?!
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Comments (100)
infiniheart 0
that's aweful ..first :)
Xuphra 0
Your dad is a ******* dick for doing that... But then again, nice of him to come over.
WorldCupCheer 0
ouch he's an ass take him out of ur life
valuemeal2 1
...At least he came to the wedding in the first place? Try to think positively!
ScottyD620 0
Least he didn't ask you for gas money to see the wedding. And your mom probably is a bitch.
yousodi 10
loool
Inspired22 11
I'm so sorry. Try not to let him get to you. It's your special day! Remember next time, you do have the right to make him leave your parties...he really would have deserved that.
PureGold 0
Oy vey :(. I bet you didn't know he smoked weed before that either. Well, at least he came!! And he wasn't drunk during the ceremony, also a plus. It sucks he did that to you though, at your own reception.
blinkblink 0
Hahahahaha #4 FTW
commonsense 0
lol roll up some of those dandelions in a joint. hell be too trashed to notice
Serial 2
so...tell us where we can score some weed
ScottyD620 0
#9 - Free alcohol is nice, but to drive a total of 800 miles for it:?
synnerr 0
Ha! Sounds like my dad... I feel for you.