Today, my girlfriend and I were watching TV. She starts to undo my belt buckle, unzips my fly and then takes my pants off. Right as I'm starting to get really excited, she says to me, "Just joking." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when she starts laughing and says, "Wow, this is just too funny." FML
Today, my fiancé and I were cuddling on the couch watching TV when we started kissing. As I crawled onto his lap and started to unzip his pants, he said, "You're blocking the TV." FML
Today, my boyfriend came before I'd even unbuttoned my pants. FML
Today, my girlfriend asked me to take my belt off as the buckle was hurting her leg. I didn't have a belt on. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were in bed. She slipped her hand under the duvet, and I got all excited thinking she was going to give me a hand job. She was actually pulling out her wedgie. FML
Today, me and my girlfriend were getting at it, and then my parents came home. I heard them and we scrambled to get our clothes on. My dad came into the room and found me wearing her pants inside out with her thong around my legs. FML
Today, my boyfriend decided to perform a strip tease for me. As he was stripping out of his clothes, he took his shirt and then pants off first. He was wearing zebra striped knee high socks and underwear. I burst out laughing. He left. FML
Today, I was fooling around with my girlfriend for the first time. She put her hand on my cock over my jeans and said, "Get hard for me." I was hard. FML
Today, I went to my room to find my girlfriend on the floor, butt up, with her pants down. I elatedly took the invitation and dropped my pants too, only for her to tell me, "Not so fast champ, I'm trying to force some farts out." FML
Today, I finally got intimate with the girl I like. As I started lifting her shirt, she stuck her hand down my pants and grabbed my junk. She immediately stopped what she was doing, snickered, and calmly said, "Take me home." FML
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Top comments
TidusBlade 0
Ouch that must have sucked, be sure to pull the same prank on her whenever you get the chance ;P
heathcoate 0
Hahahahaha. Tricked your dick.
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Comments (319)
xarcanus 0
Brutal. totally agree with # 15. She wants to play dirty? fine. play right back, but make sure you win... don't seek revenge right away; give her time to think she's gotten away with it (a month or so) and then pull it on her; she'll be expecting retaliation with in the next few weeks and out waiting her will make your revenge even sweeter.
brodizzle 0
Your balls must be a stunning purple color right now. FYL
Deee88 0
That's horrible of her!
ryan__h 1
I thought of transformers when I read this... the part where the dad pulls into the Porche (sp?) dealer
teh_ass 0
YDI for being so sex obsessed and getting a girlfriend like that.
Ninjahippy 0
@31: Yup! Passive-aggressive revenge and long-term grudges are the secret to a healthy, mutually satisfactory relationship. Seriously, ask any relationship counselor.
kspy 0
haha i've done that to my bf before, but then proceeded to walk over to the bed, stripping down as i went. it ended well. =)
greenman_fml 0
That is one of the greatest atrocities a woman can commit. That infuriates me to no end. I think she deserves an "accidental" pull out and rope-to-the-eye during oral sex.
mrcorncan99 0
Dude your an old saggy guy who probably has a raisin penis. We dont want your sex tips.
CeltricShock 0
She's not a bitch, she's funny. Certainly return the favor though. Keeps you both on your toes.
lkrofct 0
hahaha