Today, I went to my room to find my girlfriend on the floor, butt up, with her pants down. I elatedly took the invitation and dropped my pants too, only for her to tell me, "Not so fast champ, I'm trying to force some farts out." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while naked, my fiancée said there was something wrong with her butt. She turned around and I leaned in to look at it. She then farted in my face. On purpose. FML
Today, my girlfriend managed to trap a fart in her nightgown and carry it all the way from the bathroom, into our bedroom, and finally into our bed. FML
Today, my girlfriend was sitting on my lap at a birthday party. She thought it would be funny to fart. I came instantly. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I decided to try a new place to eat. On our way home we both had upset stomachs. As we raced into the house we realized neither of us could hold it any longer. Having only one bathroom, I let her go first. She exploded on the toilet and I exploded in my pants. FML
Today, I decided to treat my girlfriend by eating her out. After a while I thought she was going to cum, but instead she farted in my mouth. FML
Today, in the middle of the night, my girlfriend whispered "Are you asleep?" I chose not to respond, to see what she'd do. She then let rip a loud, stinking fart, giggled, and went back to sleep. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Because she farted, and thought it was "too awkward". FML
Today, while I was hanging out with a cute girl, I slapped her ass playfully. She told me that she was going to get me back. She slapped my ass later that night unexpectedly while I was holding in a huge fart... It came out. FML
Today, I was performing the classic 69 position with my girlfriend. I wasn't able to control it : I farted right into her nose. FML
Today, in the middle of the night, I was punched in the face by my frightened girlfriend, who had just been awoken by her own fart. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
spinningrecords 14
Not gonna lie, I would have done the same thing. It is disappointing to get that reaction though.
JackWood 21
He could offer to lend a hand or something to help her relax and squeeze them out.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (5)
spinningrecords 14
Not gonna lie, I would have done the same thing. It is disappointing to get that reaction though.
JackWood 21
He could offer to lend a hand or something to help her relax and squeeze them out.
Vesi 30
My only question is.. Why pants down? Passing gas should only be air..
GreyFox78 2
Maybe she was being careful, just in case she had to shart.
RichardPencil 32
So if you put it in and she farted, would that count as a *******? I'm sure it's in Urban Dictionary somewhere. If not, there's your entry...in a manner of speaking.
BurnInDemonFire 39
"Today, I caught my girlfriend doing pantsless yoga "trying to force some farts out". I mistook it as an invitation for some sexy time. Today, I also learned my girlfriend is not a dog. FML." There. Fixed it.