Today, my four-year-old son decided to bite my butt during prayer at church. The entire sanctuary heard me instinctively swear at him. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I got mad at my 4 year old son for cussing me out. Afterwards, I went upstairs to get ready for the day. When I came back downstairs I found him pooping on my brand new leather couch. FML
Today, my 4 year old son groped my breasts and said, "This is what daddy told me to do." FML
Today, my 6 year-old daughter decided to let out a loud fart in the middle of a quiet church service. FML
Today, one of the children at my daycare came up to me and bit me on the face. He laughed so hard at my scream, that he threw up in my lap. FML
Today, during a heated argument with my son, I lost my temper and called him a son of a bitch. He enthusiastically agreed. FML
Today, I had to profusely apologize to a woman after my six year old son decided to crawl between her legs at the supermarket, then look up her skirt and loudly ask why she didn't have any panties on. FML
Today, while at my job at a Christian summer camp, I overheard one of the kids swearing. I politely said, "Please, only speak as Jesus would." He paused for a moment and replied, "Go to hell." FML
Today, my 2-year-old son put his hand on my face, gave me a sweet kiss, and put his cheek against mine. Then he slapped me hard enough to leave a mark, laughed, and scrambled away. FML
Today, my toddler repeated a very inappropriate word I'd said when I'd stubbed my toe. He chose to do this in the middle of a crowded supermarket, loudly, and repeatedly. Now the whole town probably thinks I have questionable parenting skills. FML
Today, my son drew in Sharpie all over the wall, so I spanked him as punishment. When my boss came over for dinner, my son shouted, "Daddy made me take my punishment in the butt." FML
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Top comments
Jakesterk96 8
Bend down? How tall do you think a 4 year old is?
Lexiloulynn 2
I wonder why he bit your butt in the first place...
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Comments (234)
claudzzzz 5
things like this will happen with 4 year olds... just sayin
SwtCherryPie 26
YDI entirely. My daughter is almost 7 years old an no matter how pissed off she has made me I have never once sworn at her. Letting it slip in church just means you swear at him at home... letting your true colors show to the people around you. Besides what do you think you are teaching your kid by doing that? Sheesh.
SwtCherryPie 26
Also... If you did it "instinctively" that not only means you swear at him at home but you do it with such great frequency that you don't even think about it before you do it. I feel sorry for what else is said/done to your kid if you cuss at him at 4 years old. You are being such a hypocrite too. If something is wrong at church, it should be wrong at home too. Way to teach him young that breaking the rules are okay as long as certain people dont know about it or see it.
AhllieyBabyy7 4
I think your son wants to tap dat ass (;
cunningchick 1
I am super sorry! Erg I hope you don't go to a seventh day Adventist church....
Taurus_ChicKa 37
I'm going to put my two cents in here: First of all, everyone saying OP deserves it just for swearing at the kid needs to open their eyes. Would you rather OP beat their son? Kids have to be disciplined some way, and verbally is better than physically (though a spank on the butt wouldn't hurt either if you're at home). I'm more concerned about the fact that the kid bit his parent on the butt in the first place. What's up with that? Was he not taught that that's not something you do? OP deserves that one if he/she didn't discipline their son properly. At least they didn't brush it off like "OMG he bit my butt that's so cute." I don't condone swearing in church, but if more parents would discipline their kids, they wouldn't be getting away with everything. I'm tired of seeing kids running rampant and parents doing nothing about it for fear of getting slapped with a child abuse lawsuit. Discipline people, discipline. Swearing are your child isn't that bad. Besides, they're going to hear it at school and on TV. Hearing it from their parents wouldn't be any different.
Lily_lops95 0
Wow
Lily_lops95 0
...the holy ghost and spirit of my soul...SON OF A BITCH! DICK!
RomanBeauty 0
Who instinctively swears at kids?
Fricktion 3
Big rant about how verbally abusing children is better than physically abusing? Physically disciplining and physically abusing are 2 different things! I was beat big time as a child and I turned out fine. So did my generation. It's this new generation that has it all wrong. The world was a much better place when kids got the belt to the face! Just sayin!
pnutbutternjelly 15
don't you mean automatically? Is it really an instinct to swear at your little child who is probably getting his bad habbits from you in the first place?
perfectflower 12
I guess ya said what ya gonna do bite me??? He must of took it literally