Today, my dad said that if I walked home from school, a distance of 8 miles, he would give me $50. Two hours and four massive blisters later, I come home. When I asked for my money, he said "I was kidding." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, as I was walking home from school with my guy friends, my dad pulled up by the sidewalk, offered me a handful of dollar bills and said, "Get in, baby." Only after we drove away and he started laughing did I realize I'll probably never hear the end of this at school. FML
Today, as I was walking home from work, my dad drove past, pulled over, rolled down the window and asked, "Are you tired of walking?" To which I replied "Yes!" Just as I reached for the car door, he yelled "RUN A WHILE" and sped off. FML
Today, my dad refused to pick me up because he didn't want to get off the couch, so I had to walk for an hour and a half to get home. When I finally got home, my dad had gone out to pick my sister up from her friend's house. Her friend lives a 3-minute walk away. FML
Today, I had to walk three miles home from work. Both my parents were at home. The reason they wouldn't collect me is apparently because I've "gotten so fat, your grandma cried after she saw you". FML
Today, I finally told my dad that he owes me over 400 dollars, and that I need it or else I'd get kicked out of my apartment. He only gave me 70 and said to get a better job. FML
Today, my dad offered to pay me $40 to wash his car. Needing money to buy a video game, I agreed, and went out in the freezing weather to do the job. I finished the task, only to be paid in Monopoly money. My dad still hasn't gotten over how "funny" his prank was. FML
Today, I gave my dad $40 and asked him if he could get me lunch on his way back home. Long story short, he came back empty handed telling me it was my fault for trusting him with McNuggets. FML
Today, I went for a run when my shin splints acted up, so I called my dad to have him come pick me up. When I saw his car approaching, I stuck out my thumb like a hitchhiker, as a joke. The car pulled over to give me a ride. It wasn't my dad. FML
Today, I missed my bus. I had to ride my bike 2 miles. Once I left, some jerk nearly hit me. I flipped him off and shouted obsceneties. It was my dad, offering me a ride. He left. FML
Today, I finally summoned the courage to ask my dad to pay me as he promised, after I cut the lawn and cleaned all the house windows last week. His response was, "Get fucked." FML
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Top comments
dum_dum1 0
you should have just caught a ride with some friends and had them drop you off down the road. work smarter not harder. dumbass!!
zDylanz 6
If only every American would do this, mabey we could decrease our nation's obesity.
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Comments (382)
zemo999 0
tell him to fork over the cash, or you'll flatten his car tires....and that your NOT kidding!!
piratelady_fml 1
Wow did u show him the blisters? Maybe that will change his mind! What a cruel dad you have, am sorry :(
xlil_miss_emo_x 6
aww that sucks. As said by others before me, i wouls take the money out of his wallet. Lol but then again if I weren't set on the money, i'd probably let it go. I walk 2 miles to and from school and it's all uphill to and downhill from school each weekday so walking isn't a big thing for me but I understand to some it may be a big deal and might be quite a bit of physical work... But hang in there OP karma will get your dad someday :)
nickdunbar 8
that sucks
Grimmerie 31
i luv boners :(
piratelady_fml 1
Yea great, except that the reason why she decided to walk in the first place was because her father promised her he will pay her 50 bux! It wasn't because she didn't have a car or couldn't ride the bus!
edteach 0
131, a mile in 15 minutes is absurdly slow, j srsly op consider getting out more, an 8 mile walk should not mess you up that bad, it's a sign your not being nice to your body, unplug and go for a jog 3 times a week or swim or do something active, you will be suprized what you body can do... Easily..
joa76 3
It's actually faster than average, not even remotely close to absurdly slow. It's only SLIGHTLY above average, so it's really nothing impressive, but it's absolutely not slow.
JanisEvans 10
Will you give it a rest now? It really is ridiculously slow. And everyone who actually walks regularly seems to agree.
Melvar_10 3
I think I swim more miles :P
DocBastard 40
Is there some reason you people are so concerned with one commenter? If you find someone funny, either thumb him up or say "lol" and move on. If you don't, just move on. Telling someone he isn't funny will get you nowhere, and it's liable to get you called a cockweasel or something similar. ******* douchenozzles.
not_kidding 0
you think you have it bad? my school is an hour's dive away.