Rowden
Australia 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my boyfriend wouldn't lick the whipped cream I had on my nipples because "That stuff is full of calories." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
hannah12345
France 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my mother walked in on my boyfriend licking whipped cream off my nipples. FML
Anonymous
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my girlfriend, who's on a diet, refused to give me a blow job because my sperm would "add useless calories" to her day. FML
fml
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I agreed to let my boyfriend cover every inch of my body in whipped cream and lick it off. We were both enjoying it until his 9 year old sister walked in and started crying. FML
yourmainman
Canada 🌶️ Spicy
Desperate
Today, after months of lacking intimacy in our relationship, my girlfriend decided to spice things up by covering her naked body with whipped cream. Except, we didn't have any in the fridge, so instead I had to politely lick shaving cream off of her while fighting the urge to vomit. FML
Anonymous
Northridge, United States 🌶️ Spicy
No kinkshaming here
Today, my boyfriend told me he masturbates to the thought of me swimming in pancake syrup. FML
Snufflopagus
Lynnwood, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my boyfriend told me that sometimes my nipples taste like onions. FML
Jumja
Netherlands
Today, I found out my boyfriend's mother has invented a new kind of cake and named it after me: not because it's delicious, but because of the amount of fat in it. FML
hss
United States
Food fight
Today, my fiancé and I had a fight because he wouldn't let me get what I wanted to eat, even though it was my money. He said, "It's way too many calories. I'm supposed to help you lose weight." When I pointed out that I had given up a month ago, he looked at me and said, "Yeah, I can tell." FML
skiittlez713
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my boyfriend refused to go down on me because I smelled of baby lotion and it made him feel like a child molester. FML
lovely
San Francisco, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Yummy
Today, my boyfriend thought it'd be cute to put his penis through a doughnut and try to make me eat it off. FML
Top comments
karina_said 0
your boyfriend is a pussy
luvmybby062308 0
You should've told him you two would burn it off in a couple minutes(;
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Comments (154)
0darkfire0 0
I lol'd, 'cause when I saw this there also happened to be 69 YDI votes. :D
pasiphae9 5
You've obviously never tried whipped cream.
spermdump 0
obviously your sexual life is lacking if he doesn't think he'll burn the whipped cream calories off.
ImaginaryFoe 1
He made you wipe it off before touching you?Did he think his skin would absorb the calories? At the very least he could've suggested a shower together or wiped it off with his fingers and fed it to you. I would've packed up my stcky nipples and left.
sertralinaa 2
She's obviously eating disordered
skyeyez9 25
Fat free whipped cream next time.
shanonsy 0
What kind of guy worries about calories?? He sucks!
ktbird 0
Every guy that doesn't want to turn into a blimp will at some point in his life.
st0815 9
Wasn't the OP's problem that he doesn't suck, though?
knypny 0
your should get a new bf this ones dumb
Jaranimo 0
who cares about calories when your about to give it to your woman? I think he is as sweet as a cheesecake.
erinanastasia 0
i'm reading all the "gay" comments... idiots read!