Today, my boyfriend called me in the middle of the night and told me he got mugged and was on his way to the hospital. I told him to fuck off because that was a horrible April Fool's joke. He asked if I wanted to talk to the paramedic. I told him to stop bothering me. Turns out it was true. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend ended our relationship. He called me from his mobile phone, claimed to be a trauma surgeon, and told me with a bad German accent that my "boyfriend" had been in a fatal car crash earlier in the day. What the hell is wrong with this idiot? FML
Today, my boyfriend knocked into me with his car. I drove myself to the hospital because he couldn't stop laughing long enough to drive. FML
Today, my boyfriend accidentally called me from his pocket. I thought it would be funny to see what him and his friends were talking about. I laughed when I heard him talking about us fooling around until I realized it wasn't me. FML
Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend who's sick, he told me he felt sleepy due to meds and was going to bed. I jokingly said, "you're going to call your other girlfriend, aren't you?" There was silence before I heard, "you weren't supposed to find out like this." FML
Today, my boyfriend proposed. Three hours later, he called me to tell me he was kidding. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend paid a guy to tell me he was dead. FML
Today, my fiancé called me as I was clocking out. I thought he was going to tell me that he was waiting outside. Instead, he told me that he's getting arrested and needs me to call his mom for him. FML
Today, I wound up in hospital because my boyfriend covered my face in fake gore while I was sleeping, to see if I was really as scared of blood as I claimed. Sure enough, when I saw my reflection in the bathroom mirror, I fainted, smashing my head against the counter on the way down. FML
Today, I snuck into my boyfriend's house because I knew his parents wouldn't be there. Later, I woke up in a hospital bed because his sister thought I was a burglar and tased me. FML
Today, I visited the hospital with my boyfriend to have an injury checked. When the doctor removed the band-aid, my boyfriend started screaming and passed out. I had to get him out of the room using a wheelchair. The "injury" is a cut on his finger. FML
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Top comments
omglolydi 0
Today, I called my girlfriend on the way to the hospital after I had been mugged. She thought I was joking. When I asked if she would like to speak to the paramedic taking care of me, she called me a nuisance. I wasn't joking. FML
UrLifeDoesntSuck 0
Wow, you are a jackass. I hope he dumps you.
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Comments (164)
sonosaeterno 2
Sounds like me. I got mugged here in Philadelphia and told my girlfriend. she believed me though.. F his life. YDI
eagleclaw58 0
wow your a **** with a capital c if I were him I'd brake up with u YDI
rainstar3000 0
wow you a bitch
CabZ_fml 0
why are girls so rude these days, can't even respect their man. even if he was joking about it why would you tell him to **** off.. you would have at least showed some compassion and be sweet to him since he called you in the middle of night meaning he was probably thinking of you or something.. oh man, no offense to other ladies but I just had to express the way I feel.
Alexismaria 15
So true
hoyoyofml 0
ydi for not having trust in ur relationship
steelfever123 0
You ******* heartless ****. I hope you get mugged, raped and beaten to death.
i_wuz_nver_here 31
Ydi
ceddyz17 10
your gunna owe him some amazing head
esfox83 17
asshole
Index_fml 0
YDI for being a bitch