Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time in our relationship and it was great. He drove me back to my house and walked me to the door, then instead of kissing me goodbye he patted me on the back. Twice. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend of a month and I had sex for the first time. We started in the shower and then moved to his bedroom. He then feel asleep when I was on top. FML
Today, after making love to my boyfriend for the first time, he shook my hand and said, "Good job." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for a second time. When I was getting dressed afterwards with him sitting next to me, there was a silence. To break it, he grabbed my hand and fistbumped me. FML
Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. It was also the first time he'd ever had sex. How could I tell? He cried all the way through, and called his parents right after. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. After what seemed like an eternity of waiting, he finally entered me, then paused and asked me, "What do I do now?" FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. I started stroking the back of his neck with both of my hands. He told me, "Your hands are nice and smooth like my grandmother's." FML
Today, I finally had sex with my boyfriend. I had never gotten so far with a guy, so I was really nervous. He was careful, we tried different positions, "it was fun" and he came. I barely felt anything. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. Two minutes in, he goes, "Wow, this is strenuous" and stopped. I waited three years for this. FML
Today, I walked to my boyfriend's house, which takes literally 2 minutes since we are also neighbours. He wanted sex straight away. The walk took longer than the sex, by over a full minute. FML
Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. After he'd repeatedly told me not to worry about bleeding, and reassuring me that he'd take care of me, he passed out halfway through. FML
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Top comments
jSOPURE 3
You had bad breath? ;)
render 0
Wow lmao, that must feel terrible. (Hey, I remember I checked "Yes" to this FML while moderating!)
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Comments (115)
jSOPURE 3
You had bad breath? ;)
ryguy997 0
so at least you had sex. better than nothing!!
soul_fml 0
You had sex and then are upset cause a patted you on the back instead of kissing you? OP, u are quite odd
Pg11 0
you say it was the first time having sex with him in your relationship, does that mean you've already had sex OUTSIDE your relationship?
The_Moustache 6
Or she had bad sex.
Lwelch4567 1
Profile pic hilarious haha
amandabee 0
ugh. i hate being patted on the back.
Bullet4MyChemaMo 12
Twice? Wow, that makes a difference! Thank goodness he didn't pat your back ONCE!
mmplayer 0
hahahaha
SOD_sonofdixie 5
that sucks sweetheart. FYL, but I feel like every fml I read that I legitimately think that there was a serious dick move involved I feel like it's from florida. do y'all just breed assholes there?
render 0
Wow lmao, that must feel terrible. (Hey, I remember I checked "Yes" to this FML while moderating!)
HeavyMantis 0
Yeah thats the was i do it too ;)
zidane312 0
thats a bad sign... hope the sex was good for him... heh
alex_vik 1
Ok...that's not really an FML. He patted you on the back, big ****** deal.
WerewolfCustoms 0
He was still in shock! ;)
Feste_fml 0
If you gave him a *******, he may have wanted to avoid any backwash.
ArminAnderson 0
lol
hackymeal 0
Cumbreath!
Mattyknows 0
Oh diddums. You got to have sex with a guy you like and he patted you on the back. What shall we do?! World is over! Don't read to deep. I'm bored of these soppy "love" fmylife stories.
enormouselephant 15
Matty I'm thinking you may NOT know...
crudeandrudeguy 29
Sorry Matty, they can't all be about super hot lesbians/ sock puppets or whatever the hell you consider a good FML.
meanbeech 0
maybe the sex was only "great" for one of ya's... i mean at least he took your "sad ass" home instead of calling you a cab and letting them do the dirty work.. theres worse things in the world.. think your just being a bit dramatic