Today, my 4-year-old son's daycare called because he kissed a few girls. They explained he can't walk up and kiss little girls. I thought the situation was under control, until I was called an hour later to remove him from the premises for kissing little boys. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I can no longer leave my son at daycare, because at the age of 5, he's started manipulating the girls there into fighting over him. A kid lost a baby tooth in one such brawl. FML
Today, I just got done being yelled at by my son's headteacher and a bunch of parents, all because my 6 year-old son has been arranging kiss dates between his classmates in exchange for sweets and so on. My little pimp in training. Not a proud dad moment. FML
Today, my 4 year old son groped my breasts and said, "This is what daddy told me to do." FML
Today, my 2-year-old son put his hand on my face, gave me a sweet kiss, and put his cheek against mine. Then he slapped me hard enough to leave a mark, laughed, and scrambled away. FML
Today, I received a call from child care. Apparently, my four year-old boy tried to start a mosh pit during naptime. FML
Today, I finally found someone who liked me and wanted to kiss me. It was a 5-year-old at the daycare I work at. FML
Today, I took my son to the playground and watched him have fun. Minutes later, I was being shoved around and called a pedophile because I was there alone with no wife. By the time I convinced them I was innocent, my son was bawling. FML
Today, I was working as an intern at a day care. One of the kids touched my chest a couple of times, and I jokingly told him that he shouldn't touch old and ugly women like me. So he started groping the little girls instead. When the other teachers asked him why, he said I had told him to. FML
Today, I picked up my four year old son from daycare. As I was putting him in his car seat, I asked him if he had fun. He yelled, "Shut it, bitch!" FML
Today, I asked my 2 year old son to clean up his toys. When I bent down to give him a good job kiss afterwards, he punched me in the nose. FML
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Top comments
Chloe555_fml 27
At least he does not discriminate.
inesbcr 13
He is a serial kisser
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Comments (74)
IIEllieII 9
Why did they kick him out for kissing boys but not girls? At least you have a funny story to tell him in a few years!
trucker2 33
I know how you feel. I had daycare call CPS on me. My daughter calls the game Operations " Doctor ! And she plays doctor with her brother and he's good at special parts. 4 year old terminology. Loose the daycare.
ItalianGuy23 6
damn kids these days. when I was young I got in trouble alot though lol
messymessiah 11
He's going to be a fun teenager
Jadea_fml 12
I'd be having some words with those people about why they think a 4 year old knows any better!!! Sounds to me like your little boy is a very lovable and sweet child! Good luck to you OP!!
bellarrr 5
Well that's not sexist at all
heyLaddieHey 18
That's a tad ****/biphobic...
MattNobles 7
He's only 4 but you gotta let him know kissing boys isn't right
limegreenpoopie 31
Attack of the serial kisser!
lmbachman 23
What a horrible daycare. Find another one!!
iwadasn 33
What, they should find a daycare that lets him harass whoever he wants? If a kid continues misbehaving even after he's reprimanded, the daycare employees have to draw the line somewhere.