Today, I picked up my four year old son from daycare. As I was putting him in his car seat, I asked him if he had fun. He yelled, "Shut it, bitch!" FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was babysitting a little boy for the first time. He kept using all sorts of profanity toward me the whole evening, so I told his mom when she picked him up. She just grunted and muttered, "Fucking cunt-ass snitch." FML
Today, during a heated argument with my son, I lost my temper and called him a son of a bitch. He enthusiastically agreed. FML
Today, I had to pick my son up from school after he beat the crap out of another student. The words that made him go nuts were apparently, "You mad, bro?" FML
Today, I was driving my eight year-old son to school when a guy cut me off, prompting me to yell "Douche bag!" as a reflex out of the window. Realizing my mistake, I turned to my son and told him to never, ever talk like that. His response was, "Too late, douche bag." FML
Today, I received a call from child care. Apparently, my four year-old boy tried to start a mosh pit during naptime. FML
Today, my 4 year old son groped my breasts and said, "This is what daddy told me to do." FML
Today, my toddler learned the phrase “Shut up.” He now loudly says it to anyone who speaks to him, including our elderly neighbor, whose only crime was complimenting him on his shoes. FML
Today, I was changing my son's diaper when he said "Momma." Astonished that he'd finally spoken, I clapped and smiled proudly. My clap scared the crap out of him. Literally. FML
Today, I told my son he couldn't have a toy. He threw a fit, looked me in the eye, and screamed, "Daddy's right! You are a bitch!" The whole store was watching. FML
Today, I went over to my friend's house. Her 5 year-old son answered the door and when he saw me said, "Oh great, it's YOU!" and slammed the door in my face. FML
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Top comments
marmlr339 14
Smack that child!!
The_Earth 0
something similar to this happened with my son, Pluto, he cursed at me. so i brought him so far away from our home for doing such things and hitting my wife, his mom. why do you think he's so cold and far away and has been downgraded by humans?
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Comments (373)
marmlr339 14
Smack that child!!
smiles4life 1
haha :D sadly there's a lot of little toddlers this age with potty mouths. although it is hard to contain my laughter when I hear them curse sometimes
LolzRoyce23 0
beat the shit out of that little asshole
yafuckyourlife 4
Why prolong the inevitable? ha just wanted to sound like every other asshole on here
Mr_26 0
I agree with #2. This little shit is disrespecting you cause you let him. You need teach that punk some respect. Let fear be the teacher and vicious beatings the lesson.
glambert1998 0
JUST DONT SMACK HIM IN PUBLIC!!!!!U WILL BE ARRESTED 4 CHILD ABUSE!!!!!
thatguy888 0
poor child
thatguy888 0
you are a phaggot. Adam lambert is a gay retard just like you.
kidwiththehair12 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
when you get home pull his pants down and stick rocks up his ass and tell him it's for disrespecting you, I swear he won't do it again... little asshole -.-. (I've never done this)
underaegis 0
omg Thatguy moderated the comment! I say put the little dick up for adoption and try again. Maybe OP should try with pizza boy up there he looks like he could use a girlfriend
InDenial 6
Wow 74. You're really beautiful.
smiles4life 1
thanks. lol
rgriff95 0
wow 308, you're a real ******.
mooshibear140 4
#2, haha. Agreed. :) OP, at least your child answered the question. He did not have fun. xD
macewindo26 0
no
ashleylucky16 6
Lmao. Winning.
sparklesxD 0
win.
EmoOrange 0
that's what he learned :) been watching too much elmo. lol.
mikey0505 0
lol
stevendsi 0
u mean emo
KCTruth4 0
haha elmo behind the scenes
roxycat97 0
lol XD
HahaHokayThen 10
sounds like me.
HahaHokayThen 10
why thank you :D
frank7525 0
hahahaha
chico1014 0
your really beautiful!
HahaHokayThen 10
thank you lol (:
YouAlwaysDeserve_fml 0
u ugly. i purdy
Cinn_fml 23
Some kids have no respect. :P More seriously, OP, kids will learn words like that from sources you can't prevent, it's upto you to explain to them that they shouldn't use them.
Thin_Ice_fml 0
Agreed. Society these days.,.
ohrlynow 9
Pretty much this. You can (mostly) control what a child is exposed to in your own home, but once they're in school, interacting with other kids, they start learning things that you'd rather not have them know. I remember asking my mother what an ****** was on the way home from my kindergarten class, and she nearly crashed the car.
Spastastic 6
Once when I was a kid I was watching tv with my parents, and I asked them what genital herpes was after a commercial for herpes medication came on. HAH.
IIFoxII 0
Cinn , your comments are always so intelligent , I hope to be more like you one day :)
jinxthejinx 0
Spastastic, you are adorable & I want your bathing suit.
Spastastic 6
jinx -- it's a genuine vintage bathing suit. :)
Icyyy 0
Agreed. But that child needs to be introduced to the soap bar, if he keeps using that language. :P Though when I was little, my mom used dish soap. :/
angela3222 0
cinn, every comment I see of yours I ALWAYS agree on. you should be the popular ones on fml. not some stupid trolls.
dwold91 3
#156 .... I really REALLY hope your not serious! :/
ChampionKO 6
u ugly >=S
Cinn_fml 23
*sighs exasperatedly* ChampionKO, you didn't get very far with that last time. So don't try again. If you call other people ugly, you will get shouted at by someone, even if it's not who you called ugly. It's not cool. Also, thanks IIFoxII and Angela.
Spastastic 6
309 -- Why, exactly, do you "really REALLY hope" she's not serious? Would a difference of opinion regarding myself really be all that offensive to you? Also, you're*.
ChampionKO 6
okokok sry lol I was jk :)
stronghand0331 17
I wonder if he learned that from his teacher...
HahaHokayThen 10
you're so pretty! sorry off topic haha
ashleylucky16 6
Lol I dont think four year olds go to school
Waffle817 0
LOL idk if anybody else just died laughing from this but I know I did .... sorry op
bman134 0
yes I did too child win
GLOCKMAMA 0
I did. I think it's hilarious. & all y'all gettin on the kid so hard & what should b done, remember he picked it up from somewhere, & it prolly wasn't daycare. This is prolly somethin OP has said 2 the kid's mom.
YANKSFAN4EVER 0
Lol that's funny but I would B slap him
JtownDude 0
lmfao!
GtDriver 6
There's kids for you.
randomchickkk 0
kids say the darnest things.