Today, me and my girls went to get revenge on a girl who slept with my boyfriend by egging her house. Her house was too far away so we decided to get her truck. We wasted a carton of eggs on her driveway because we all have terrible aim and look incredibly stupid for missing so bad. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went to egg my ex-boyfriend's house, after finding out he cheated on me. I covered his house and car with eggs, toilet paper, and silly string. When I went to get back in my car, my keys were locked inside, the alarm went off, and my ex walked outside, with his new girlfriend. FML
Today, while at work at my grocery store I sold a TON of eggs to a bunch of kids. We joked around that they were "going to bake a giant cake." When I got home I found out someone had egged my house. FML
Today, I egged my cheating ex’s car. Actually, I should clarify; I egged my cheating ex’s sister’s car, thinking it was his. She gave me a black eye and knocked out two of my teeth while my ex laughed his ass off. FML
Today, I fell down my stairs while holding a carton of eggs I was going to use to egg my ex-boyfriend's house. Karma's definitely a bitch to me. FML
Today, my house was pelted with rotten eggs. Apparently, my daughter and her friends are bullying a boy in her class. So, his older brother set out for revenge. According to the threatening note he left, "This is just the start if they don't leave him alone." My daughter thinks this means she should bully harder. FML
Today, my house got egged and since it is the winter the eggs froze. They used two dozen eggs. FML
Today, my dad forced me to take part in a pathetic act of revenge against our neighbors, who keep parking their 4x4 in front of our house. He made me stand watch while he kept trying to slash their tires. An hour later, we were waiting for my mom to bail us out of jail. FML
Today, I wanted to prank my girlfriend by giving her a jump scare. Right before I tried to scare her in an empty parking lot, she turned towards me, pepper-sprayed me in the eyes and kicked me in the balls. When she realized it was me, she called me an asshole and dumped on the spot and drove away. FML
Today, my psychopathic ex-girlfriend spray-painted "Free Candy" on the side of my van, knowing damn well I have to park it in front of an elementary school on a daily basis to pick up my daughter. FML
Today, I snuck out to see my girlfriend in the middle of the night. When I got to her house, I decided to throw a rock at her window to wake her up. It broke a hole in the window. FML
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Top comments
flinkpamingo 0
First, you shouldn't be mad at her. HE is the one who dogged you. Secondly, grow up, get a life and realize that anyone who makes you that angry and treats you like that isn't worth the power it takes to squish a bug. What a waste. Go find someone who acctually loves you and wants to be with you. Come on, suck it up and move on, and have a nice day. You deserve better.
Lolbrittany 0
should've egged HIS house/vehicle.
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Comments (147)
shadow_foot 0
God, I hate it when people act like this; seriously don't blame it on the other girl, take it out on your boyfriend for cheating on you. The other girl most likely didn't know your boyfriend was in a relationship. It just really gets on my nerves when people don't get angry at their cheating spouse, but instead take out their anger on the person with whom their spouses were in a relationship. All in all, YDI big-time, bitch.
Alexgoesfml 3
How did you know the girl your boyfriend was single. Also shouldn't you be mad at your boyfriend, you deserve it for being an idiot. Also lol @ 'me and my girls', anyone else find that funny?
AntiChrist7 0
so your boyfriend is the jerk and the girl gets it? YDI for having an asshole as boyfriend
shananigans 0
How the hell do you miss a truck? A TRUCK?! And I agree with the others, I hope you at least egged your boyfriend's car too (or tried to). I hate that whole "blame the other woman" mentality. Your boyfriend knew exactly what he was doing. For all you know the girl didn't even know he HAD a girlfriend, or he lied and told her you broke up.
Malexhe 0
This reminds why I hate most girls, most of them are jealous dumb *****.
theanonimouse 0
If this is what you get out of this FML, I'm sorry. But shouldn't you also hate most guys for being "cheating bastards"?
mehwhateverr 0
So you went and egged the other woman, who may or may not have known he was taken but you didn't egg your current boyfriend? In fact, you're still WITH that boyfriend? WTF? YDI.
maddog_fml 0
Who cares! FML for reading this crap story :/
SookMauNoots 0
wow shitty storie. and why didnt u jus go closer to the house. dumbbasses
Petorious09 0
Wow you sound like a huge bitch, I don't even know why you posted that on here, obviously people are going to point out what a bitch you are. Anyways it's your boyfriend you should be mad at, although you shouldn't go around damaging anyones property. And I agree with 58, It's quite amazing that you managed to miss the vehicle, reguardless of its size, and with a whole carton of eggs, were you blindfloded and a block away? someone who needed food more than you could have made good use and eaten those, what a waste. anyways, try working on not being such an idiot/bitch, it will work in your favor in the future... oh and work on your aim a little too if you want.
9az00 0
"me and my girls" with the hippin and the hoppin and the bippin and the boppin...lolz, you so gangsta