Today, it was my wedding day. With my best friend as the priest, she asked, "Do you take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband?" After saying I do, she then turned to him and asked, "Do you want to bang my friend?" Everyone laughed, except my already disapproving father. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was the best man at a wedding and I was flirting with a cute bridesmaid. Then this old guy decides to give the newlyweds a toast. He made a crappy joke and barely anybody laughed. So I say to the girl, "Wow that sucked, who the hell does he think he is?" The girl replies, "That's my dad". FML
Today, I found my two best friends making out with each other. Not a big deal, right? Wrong. Today was my wedding day. One of the friends was my maid of honor, the other was my groom. FML
Today, I realized how single I truly am when I blurted out "Yes!" as soon as the priest asked the bride, "Do you take this man…" The bride was my sister and you could hear a pin drop after I blurted it out before she had a chance to respond. FML
Today, during my wedding ceremony, the groom-to-be found it appropriate to blurt out about an ongoing affair with my maid of honor. They got married instead. FML
Today, I married my best friend in the whole world at a small romantic venue. By that I mean I married my actual best mate while completely hammered at a drive-through wedding chapel. My fiancée is gonna kill me when she finds out. FML
Today, I found out that my father asked my best friend to marry him. He's 38 and we're 18. She said yes. FML
Today, I got married. When my father gave me away, in front of hundreds of people, to my groom, he said, "She's your problem now." FML
Today, I overheard my best friend laughing and calling my fiance lame and stupid, all because he proposed to me with a bouquet instead of a ring. And here I was about to ask if she would be my maid of honor… FML
Today, at our wedding reception my new father-in-law gave his speech, saying his little girl was too good for me. Everyone, including my parents, agreed. FML
Today, my fiancé's best friend, who will be our best man at our wedding, decided to confess his feelings for me and tell me how he's always dreamed of us eloping together. The wedding is going to be awkward. FML
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Top comments
bogart20 13
By the power vested in her, he may "bang her friend"!
SweetlyPsycho 4
Leave it to your friends to make your wedding day something completely awkward! And then...your husband looks your father in the eye and says 'I DO!', like a boss!
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Comments (180)
Birdie_Sage 0
Your friend is a priest? What is wrong with our world!?!? Your father has every right to disapprove, apparently.
Yourheadache 19
Really???
QueenSaru 28
Yes, because between rape, murder, child abduction, stealing, war, etc, a female priest is the BIGGEST problem with the world today... seriously were you dropped on your head as child? Because I was, and even I'm not that idiotic...
perdix 31
And the pope says, "This is why we don't let women be priests!"
eb0ny 15
It's your wedding day, get off FML.
THE_A_TEEN 28
Just because the FML starts with "Today", doesn't mean the actual FML moment happened today. For all we know, this could have happened years ago, weeks ago, this past weekend, etc. Remember, the "Today" is MANDITORY, just like the "FML" at the end.
katcot99 11
Why wouldn't you hire a professional?
Xythenol 6
Who's to say her friend isn't a professional?
Xythenol 6
Who's to say her friend isn't a professional?
effedml 5
The friend's question to the groom says it.
katcot99 11
No professional would say that.
BubbleGrunge 18
Just because her BFF made a joke in the middle of the ceremony, doesn't mean she isn't professional. Apparently, everyone else found it funny, with the exception of OPs father. And, judging from the way OP worded her FML, daddy didn't seem to care for the husband anyway.
mikemillzy92 6
Apparently you do not understand A wedding ceremony very serious thing... That was not professional at all
Devin91 20
That's hysterical
KaelaKhaotic 5
Why would you have your friend be the priest if you knew they were gonna do this?
PYLrulz 17
Your dad needs to lighten up.
ClosetTroll 10
Drat! Your husband didn't do so well at paintball I see.
stevenmx86 8
How do you not deserve something like this? Why would you pull in a friend as the priest if you wanted professionalism?
gracehi 33
Why on Earth would she say that publicly AT A WEDDING??? Seriously, your friend needs to go to charm school or something.
OffToTheGayBar 9
Yeah, cause hanging out with Flavor Flav is what she needs at this point.