Today, I married my best friend in the whole world at a small romantic venue. By that I mean I married my actual best mate while completely hammered at a drive-through wedding chapel. My fiancée is gonna kill me when she finds out. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I married the love of my life. I was ecstatic until the wedding reception, where my new husband got drunk and started crying about how he'd been "forced" into marrying me. FML
Today, I found my two best friends making out with each other. Not a big deal, right? Wrong. Today was my wedding day. One of the friends was my maid of honor, the other was my groom. FML
Today, I watched my best friend get married to the guy I have been in love with since the eighth grade. I was the maid of honor, and had to give a toast to the couple. FML
Today, my fiancé's best friend, who will be our best man at our wedding, decided to confess his feelings for me and tell me how he's always dreamed of us eloping together. The wedding is going to be awkward. FML
Today, I married the man of my dreams. While I was being driven to our wedding reception, I checked my Facebook. My husband had just updated his status to "Me and the bitch just got hitched." FML
Today, I married the beautiful girl I’ve been in love with since we were both 6 years old. By married, I mean I performed the marriage ceremony as the vicar and watched her smile and kiss her arsehole boyfriend, now husband, right in front of me. FML
Today, I found out my best friend has been stealing hundreds of dollars from me and my fiancé. My wedding is tomorrow morning. Guess who my best man is. FML
Today, it was my wedding day. With my best friend as the priest, she asked, "Do you take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband?" After saying I do, she then turned to him and asked, "Do you want to bang my friend?" Everyone laughed, except my already disapproving father. FML
Today, I overheard my best friend laughing and calling my fiance lame and stupid, all because he proposed to me with a bouquet instead of a ring. And here I was about to ask if she would be my maid of honor… FML
Today, I got married to the love of my life, with whom I've been with for 5 years. It's also one of the 3 times a year where he's got so drunk that, instead of puking in the bed like last time, he puked all over the side of my car while I was driving us home. FML
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Top comments
Allie614032 34
I mean, it should be easy enough to get the marriage annulled, no?
interesting33 37
is it legal to marry your dog?
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Comments (31)
interesting33 37
is it legal to marry your dog?
Allie614032 34
I mean, it should be easy enough to get the marriage annulled, no?
shellzy 20
Is your best friend’s name “Dave?” If it is, don’t worry. In ten years it’ll be a meme.
Gamessence 19
Not A meme, THE MEME.
Levi2411 41
I mean if you like him drunk, maybe you can hit it sober. Did you like the wedding night-
azouwa 26
Because no good story started with, "Hold my milk."
Dave_Davington 34
So how was your wedding night?
jbuckets_404 39
OP, you oughta be able to contest your marriage license since you obviously weren't sober when you signed the marriage license (a standard req't when signing a contract). Good luck on all fronts! But YDI....
Melanie Jane Tilson 8
Sounds almost exactly like that episode of Friends when Ross and Rachel got married in Vegas......
RichardPencil 32
Polygamy is an option.
Yudith 28
Maybe, but in the states where it is legal, same-sex marriage isn't.
ChakatBlackstar 29
Actually same-sex marriage is legal in all states now. Has been for a while.
ARISKomuniszt 24
The next published FML will be by the fiancée, I can feel it...