Today, I wore a fake wedding ring on my left hand when buying a pregnancy test so the cashier at Walmart wouldn't think I'm a slut. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I bought a fake "wedding ring" at Target to play a prank on my parents. They kicked me out, saying my "fiancé" can take care of me now. There is no fiancé, and I just lost my job. FML
Today, I confessed to losing my wife's engagement ring, and replacing it with a lookalike months ago. My wife also confessed that her actual engagement ring was locked in the safe, and the one I lost had been a fake. I've been paying the replacement off on my credit card for 6 months. FML
Today, my wife figured out I gave her a dollar store ring for our anniversary. FML
Today, my husband went on a boys' night but I found his wedding ring on the nightstand so I confronted him when he got home. He was wearing his ring. What I had was a brass olive ring for plumbing so now I look like a jealous idiot. FML
Today, I went to sell my wedding rings, due to the fact that I'm getting divorced from a man who cheated on me. The jeweler informed me that the stone in my engagement ring is fake. I won't even be able to cover the divorce costs from the proceeds. FML
Today, I once again bought condoms at the gas station to make the people who work there think that I have a sex life. FML
Today, I bought Plan B for the first time. Not because I had unprotected sex, but to make the cashier think someone would actually sleep with me. FML
Today, the clerk at Walmart asked me if the stretch mark cream I was buying was for my wife. I wish I could've said yes. FML
Today, I went to a store to buy a man's thong because my girlfriend wanted me to. When I went in I also grabbed some lingerie for her. Thinking I was being clever I wrapped it up in a t-shirt so no one would notice and went to checkout. The cashier then called for a price check on the thong. FML
Today, I went to a jeweler's to buy a ring to propose to my girlfriend. When I was at the restaurant, in mid-proposal, with people watching, I realized I had left the ring in the store. FML
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Top comments
Cupcaken 0
if you're old enough to be married, I doubt anyone would think you a **** just for having sex.
geekemo92 0
You care what a cashier at Walmart thinks about you?
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Comments (371)
shift_love 13
why would you ever care what someone who works at walmart thinks? they prolly have 4 retarded dirty kids at home.
Barney_Rubble_75 0
whoah! pretty harsh there!
bodoquito89 0
do you seriously think cashiers think of you after you leave. they don't care about what you are buying and you are not important enough for them to give you a second thought
CAPTmok 7
Who told you?? do you know how boring a cashier would be when there are no customers, just sitting and staring into blank space (btw I'm not a cashier)
jdc408cal 0
I have been. and yes I remember most people that walk trough the door.
SteelCladAngel 0
my husband still won't buy condoms lol!! he says it makes him uncomfortable
SteelCladAngel 0
my husband still won't buy condoms lol!! he says it makes him uncomfortable
5t3ff1k4h 47
I have a knack for remembering odd details, so if a customer were to buy either a giant crap-load of stuff, or a simple yet weird object, I'd remember it. That said, I worked in a job where I had to remember most customers.
MathMajor6 6
I worked as a cashier and I never remembered what people bought unless they acted awkward about it or made comments, or if it was someone I knew. I just really don't care that much.
anakaren_831 1
wow, if you aren't a **** then you shouldn't be worried about anyone thinking you're one.
Tuesdays76 0
Who said she isn't?
polysyllabist 3
Wait wait wait... you bought a pregnancy test at a Walmart?? You don't have a local drug store of some kind?? What kind of city do you live it? What kind of life do you lead? You know what, it doesn't matter about your embarrassment at all. I'm piecing together your state of existence and, indeed, FYL OP.
SteelCladAngel 0
maybe she was already grocery shopping and didnt want to make an extra stop
SteelCladAngel 0
maybe she was already grocery shopping and didnt want to make an extra stop
SteelCladAngel 0
maybe she was already grocery shopping and didnt want to make an extra stop
flickyourbic1223 7
Maybe she was already grocery shopping and didn't want to make an extra stop.
perfectchaos 0
what's the difference in buying a pregnancy text from Walmart or a drug store. it's the same thing there pookie.
nerdchic 5
good job on saying that 4 times... and that's where I buy mine.. walmart is just easier to buy shit at
flickyourbic1223 7
215 They posted it THREE separate times so I just kept it going. If you wanted to look smart by pointing out mistakes you chose the wrong comment.
HeJustKnowsBest 3
Perhaps if you're so self conscious you shouldn't go around having sex before marriage ****. And besides, who cares what a cashier thinks of you, it's not like their opinions matter.
babyblue666 1
just cause ur getting a prego test doesnt mean ur a ****. the cashier doesnt know u or ur life **** them and what they think
misscourtneyy 0
Soooo.. buying a preg test automatically makes you a **** ?! woooowww..... grow up and wgaf what people thinks!
redsoxgrl824 11
so what, my brother and his gf are having a baby and no one thinks she's a **** just cause they're not married. and not like the cashire gives a damn if your having sex and not married
SofaKingFast 0
As Freud would say, it sounds like your projecting your own thoughts onto the cashier. So quit thinking your a **** and see how that works. Should I send you my bill now or later?
SofaKingFast 0
Sure he was a nut job that based most of his work off of his own experiences, but many of his theories (such as coping mechanisms) as well as the form of therapy adopted from his therapy style (known as psychoanalytic psychotherapy) are still in use today.
SofaKingFast 0
oops, missed the word "work" in there. I'm sure you can figure out where it needs to be :p
SofaKingFast 0
Haha, give the guy a break. He just tried to normalize his incestuous desired by claiming everyone had them. Nothing wrong with forcing your beliefs onto other people, is there?
OzzyJones 0
You shouldn't give a damn what da cashier thinks of you. Also, a married woman can still be a ****! I know a woman who's been married for almost 20 years and she's a hoe!
tweetbaby14 18
you know a woman that has been married for 20 years and she has been a gardening tool the entire time? that is pretty interesting that her husband and the (wo)men she sleeps with are all objectumsexuals.