Today, I wore a fake wedding ring on my left hand when buying a pregnancy test so the cashier at Walmart wouldn't think I'm a slut. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I bought a fake "wedding ring" at Target to play a prank on my parents. They kicked me out, saying my "fiancé" can take care of me now. There is no fiancé, and I just lost my job. FML
Today, I confessed to losing my wife's engagement ring, and replacing it with a lookalike months ago. My wife also confessed that her actual engagement ring was locked in the safe, and the one I lost had been a fake. I've been paying the replacement off on my credit card for 6 months. FML
Today, my wife figured out I gave her a dollar store ring for our anniversary. FML
Today, my husband went on a boys' night but I found his wedding ring on the nightstand so I confronted him when he got home. He was wearing his ring. What I had was a brass olive ring for plumbing so now I look like a jealous idiot. FML
Today, I went to sell my wedding rings, due to the fact that I'm getting divorced from a man who cheated on me. The jeweler informed me that the stone in my engagement ring is fake. I won't even be able to cover the divorce costs from the proceeds. FML
Today, I once again bought condoms at the gas station to make the people who work there think that I have a sex life. FML
Today, I bought Plan B for the first time. Not because I had unprotected sex, but to make the cashier think someone would actually sleep with me. FML
Today, the clerk at Walmart asked me if the stretch mark cream I was buying was for my wife. I wish I could've said yes. FML
Today, I went to a store to buy a man's thong because my girlfriend wanted me to. When I went in I also grabbed some lingerie for her. Thinking I was being clever I wrapped it up in a t-shirt so no one would notice and went to checkout. The cashier then called for a price check on the thong. FML
Today, I went to a jeweler's to buy a ring to propose to my girlfriend. When I was at the restaurant, in mid-proposal, with people watching, I realized I had left the ring in the store. FML
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Top comments
Cupcaken 0
if you're old enough to be married, I doubt anyone would think you a **** just for having sex.
geekemo92 0
You care what a cashier at Walmart thinks about you?
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Comments (371)
coolhwip_cheez 2
good luck removin ur cute lil price tag tatoo
Boomer21 0
lol that one was great
mousekiller 0
f your baby's life moms an idiot
kaeleymel 6
I work as a cashier and whenever someone buys a pregnancy test I have never even thought about looking for a wedding ring. You're just paranoid.
tameka17 0
who cares what they think.
i_wuz_nver_here 31
But you are
nrelavender 10
ydi for thinking just because you have sex before marriage means you're a ****. unless you are a ****. ydi either way.
lalalihsuh 0
can you say insecure ? lolz
iizcalebhearmero 0
please dont give about those religious wackos.
fizzpoplady 3
You think you might be preggers and your biggest concern is the opinion of a Wal-Mart cashier? You need to get your priorities straight.
lsswimmer 1
well are you?