Today, I bought Plan B for the first time. Not because I had unprotected sex, but to make the cashier think someone would actually sleep with me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Make believe
Today, I once again bought condoms at the gas station to make the people who work there think that I have a sex life. FML
Running commentary
Today, I nervously went to the store to buy condoms for the first time. I felt like everything was going well, and checked out happily. As I was walking out, the cashier lady said to the woman next in line, "He thinks he's going to need condoms." They both looked at me and started laughing. FML
Today, I went to the local pharmacy to buy some condoms. When I went to go purchase them, the elderly lady behind the counter took one look at me and said, "Honey, you're your own birth control." FML
Today, I went to the pharmacy to buy the Plan B pill. The pharmacist recognized me and said, "Really? Again?" FML
Today, I went out to buy a bottle of wine and some condoms. As the cashier scanned the condoms, she snickered and muttered, "Yeah right." She was right; I really was just desperate to look like I have a sex life. I got so upset that I left my items and walked out with tears in my eyes. FML
Shy boy
Today, a friend asked me if I'd buy him some condoms because he's too shy to buy them himself. I obliged and whilst queuing at the till to buy them I felt someone tap my shoulder. I turned around to see my fiancée glaring at me. We don't use condoms. FML
Too little, too late
Today, I went to the health department to get on some birth control. I left the health department without birth control, and with the news that I'm pregnant. FML
You have mail!
Today, I bought a Plan B at CVS. I always use my parents' phone number for reward points. Turns out my mom is enrolled in digital receipts. FML
Today, I wore a fake wedding ring on my left hand when buying a pregnancy test so the cashier at Walmart wouldn't think I'm a slut. FML
Today, when I went to pay for my groceries, I accidentally handed the cashier a condom instead of my $20. FML
Top comments
idkweird 0
Why the hell would the person at the pharmacy counter care whether or not you're having sex? Pathetic.
succubusprime 0
YDI for wasting $50 on someone who will forget about you seconds after leaving the store.
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Comments (146)
pepsie_fml 0
omg that sucks
morena0603 0
You depress me!!!
ilovechuux13 0
ouch!
succubusprime 0
YDI for wasting $50 on someone who will forget about you seconds after leaving the store.
thecbake4 0
this is really really really sad...it's sad because you think you have to impress someone you do not even know and you will probably never see them again in your life. <Jedi mind trick> You want to go home and rethink your life...
allen20 0
You ppl are so desperate. Thats why theres things in this world like rapism, child abuse, and pedophiles. A good example is the OP!
alison89 0
I was thinking the same thing.
thor89 0
Well you still have youre hand HEY put in hand lotion and it's a 3 WAY
sublimaze 6
u shoulda bought a vibrator instead
DavidCooksAngel 0
I agree with 31 FYL for even having to do something like that :-/
dirtygurdy 0
i agree with 65
marc33 0
hey people... what's plan B..?? is it something that test urself or what??!
JeaanPauul 0
you're to insecure therefore ydi!!!
Donandino 0
it's the morning after pill. it's something that women can take within a few days of having been ejaculated in to prevent a pregnancy. they only work within like 2 days of having sex and they cost like $50. each! Actually I'm pretty sure plan b more commonly is used to refer to abortion but OP was referring to the morning after pill
idkweird 0
#95: No, Plan B is used to describe the morning after pill it's named after. Ive never heard it used as a term to mean abortion. Although, had the egg been fertilized, it technically is providing a chemical abortion. Also, it's not JUST if the woman has been ejaculated in. It's for any unprotected sex, as precum contains sperm. The Plan B pill can be taken up to 72 hours after the unprotected sex.
gth829c 0
::I want to go home...and rethink my life..::
paigeatsflesh 11
I'm sure your not THAT ugly! go to a bar and ask a drunk person if they want to hook up.
dearladydisdain 0
um, how about you just buy a pack of condoms or something? it's a hell of a lot cheaper.
dearladydisdain 0
or you could just be a normal person and not care about what a cashier thinks. lolz.
albinomustang 0
@allen20 rapism?
demon1k 0
Shouldve bought a shotgun and 1 shell. or a good strong rope. or a razor blade.
Donandino 0
hmm thanks 102. For some reason I heard plan b referring to abortion that's why I thought that's what it was. thanks for clearing it up
twist_of_fame93 0
I'm in awe. not at her situation but at what she did. that's just sad
lancer126 0
I just thought plan b was a skate board company
schnitzel5 0
what's plan b
BMaC101 0
Today, I saw this girl trying to impress me by spending 50$ on a pill to make it look like she's been laid. FML
Secret_Fire_King 0
Hells Yeah OP.. That cashier was sweating for you.. Tip for the ladies: Guys find, buying products to kill your unborn baby, super hawwt.. (by now I hope you've realised that I was speaking sarcastically.. and that I find nothing sexy about the pill.. If I had served the OP, I'd be convinced she was a bit of a ***** for purchasing Plan B from the corner store alongside her m&m's and newspaper..) YDI for thinking that killing unborn humans was an effective way to tap that cashier..
foolishworkerbee 0
the morning after pill and abortion pill are two completely separate medications. plan b causes the uterine lining to become really thick, preventing a fertilized egg from implanting. if an egg doesn't implant, it's not a pregnancy. the abortion pill is used to terminate a pregnancy if either plan b or any other precautions taken have failed.
abradant_spoon 0
Plan B does NOT kill an unborn baby. Wow seriously it even says in the commercials "Plan B is not the abortion pill." It prevents the pregnancy. Get your facts straight.
idkweird 0
I think 158 put that perfectly. The only reason I used the words "chemical abortion" in my previous comment is because it will prevent a fertilized egg from attaching. Then again, birth control kind of does the same thing. Convinces your body that your pregnant so that either you can't release an egg or it can't implant, if it happens to release. :)
liveloveandownit 0
I am assuming she is going to a pharmacy to get the pill and if she goes there regularly enough to want to impress the casheer than she might be really stupid in his eyes if she sees him regularly because of taking the birthcontroll pill.
Secret_Fire_King 0
Ok.. I understand now..
iElliie 4
actually if your pregnant you shouldn't take the pill, it's to prevent pregnancy not to abort it
iElliie 4
#156 it's not meant for that YDI
timk_fml 2
lol. that's so sad.
asianwolf 2
are you giving the casier a subliminal message?
applebee_16 0
exactly. I really don't think that person is going to spend the day thinking that their customer was getting laid... don't waste ur money hun
tweetbaby14 18
there's these cheap things call male hookers. you might wanna invest in one
zackd23 0
wow
GearsFan56 1
hahaha
Tannerzpro 0
haha "Plan B"...does no one else find that funny lol
dilligaf24 1
agree with 19...waste of moneyy
carteran06 0
ha ****** up lmao
enormouselephant 15
So you spent $60 to make someone think you had sex? He must be a very special cashier...
VolcomTL 0
i sound stupid asking but what does OP and YDI mean.?
Horney4her69 0
original poster you dumb idiot
darkmis1 18
OP: original poster YDI: you deserve it
Horney4her69 0
oh yeah... you deserve it... I always read it the other way... :p
Mehness 0
#27 fails XD
shananigans 0
Most of the time "You Dumb Idiot" works too.
Joey7361 0
never heard of it put that way but yea #27 is actually a win
knockasauras 0
"You dumb idiot" almost never works. most of the time ppl say, "YDI because.." or, "YDI you effin dumbass", or somethin to that effect =)
maa_rico 4
27 FTW
liveloveandownit 0
Or maybe 27 just felt bad for insulting 6 by calling them an idiot and it was more convenient to feign ignorance as to what YDI really meant.
sjoe789 0
op= person who made the post in the first place/ original poster ydi= you deserved it no worries tho I had to Google it to find out :)
musicisadrug 0
at volcom it means you deserved it
gagapet 0
I completely understand you... :( I'm in the same position...18 years ols girl..even never been kissed (hugs)
mezsed 0
don't be waiting for it to happen, or expect it to happen. you'll see that when you least expect it, you'll be happy
Rustbin 0
This. It's really not that special
albinomustang 0
WTF I saw a show on TV and this girl said she was saving her first kiss for her husband. I was like HAHAHAHA!!!!! cuz her parents were crazy.
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
#129, those people DO exist, because I accidentally dated one! I didn't find out till 2 months into the relationship, when I tried to kiss him
indianabummer 0
129, I worked with one, only a tad less extreme. She had been dating her boyfriend for a year and 2 months and they *finally* had their first kiss. It wasn't even a make out, just a peck on the lips. I asked, and she was disgusted by the idea of tongue kissing and said they were waiting till marriage.
Ragna_fml 0
Why would you do that? Is your life ****** if you don't impress the cashier?
idkweird 0
Why the hell would the person at the pharmacy counter care whether or not you're having sex? Pathetic.
morena0603 0
you are so right #10.
DOEETFORTEHLULZ 0
OP means origional poster, i.e. the chick who no1 will sleep with
kazumaslayer666 3
maybe in her mind he figured he would be like "Hey baby...let me be your plan C..."
idkweird 0
Haha, ok, that made me laugh!
humorizer 14
Number 15, how is it that in such a small post you made so many errors? OP stands for original poster, first of all. Not origional poster. Second, it's "nobody", not "no1" Third, don't end a sentence with a preposition. Fourth, it's whom, not who. A better way of phrasing your sentence would have been, "OP is an abbreviation that is shorthand for 'Original Poster'; i.e. the lady with whom no one will have sexual intercourse."
sammieshortcake 15
You actually made yourself sound worse by being an arrogant ass.
katiekat23 0
awww I'm sorry:( don't feel bad I'm sure a lot of people feel that way
KurouTenshi 0
so, do you feel any better?
Sun_Kissed18 25
Probably not. And now the cashier is probably judging you for having unprotected sex IF he's even thought about you at all. You'd have been better off buying condoms, they are cheaper.
goldenone 2
I like your avatar
KurouTenshi 0
thanks 99 :)
humorizer 14
Don't get your hopes up. He's flirting with the girl that replied to you. lol
xxx4life 0
and not to mention that stuff cost like $50 what a waste of money you're stupid op