Today, I woke up to my 8 month old son happy as can be. I could hear him laughing over the monitor. When I walked into the room, he had somehow got his diaper off and was holding onto his new found penis. He thought it was hysterical when it went off and shot urine everywhere. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I thought it would be a good idea to let my 19-month-old son watch me pee, since I'm trying to potty train him. I didn't consider that he might try to grab my penis. When he did, I was startled and peed all over the floor and my son. Good job dad. FML
Today, my toddler peed in his potty for the first time. He was so excited to show me that he flung the pot in the air dousing my face with his piss. Then he laughed. FML
Today, my one year-old took his diaper off and peed on my chest while I was sleeping. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were changing our newborn son when he peed on her, making me lose it laughing. Less than five seconds later, as I picked him up to clean him off, he did a huge poop, all over my hands, arms, feet, and clothes. Instant Karma. FML
Today, my son learned how to use the toilet for the first time. He was so excited he started peeing on the floor. FML
Today, while we had my husband's boss over, my 3-year-old son decided to burst into the living room naked and yell, "Mum, look! Penis!" and wiggle it around. FML
Today, I woke up to my daughter crying, and my son running through the living room completely naked with her bottle, laughing his head off. FML
Today, I came home to find my husband and our 4-year-old son simultaneously peeing off the second-floor balcony. My husband was giggling like a little girl. FML
Today, my 2-year-old son figured out that if he takes his pull-up off and DOESN'T go on the potty, he can pee all over things. FML
Today, I woke up to my lovely 16-month old with her diaper on. When I stood up to retrieve and toss it, I also realized she'd pooped into her hand and thrown a log onto the middle of the floor. FML
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Top comments
allmidnighteyes 11
Oh, how it shot from his member like a geyser from the earth Covering the room with the bittersweet aroma of piss The drip on the walls, it running down his balls Oh the majestic beauty, splendor precipitating
Florg 0
lol he painted the room yellow, a perfect baby color.
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Comments (151)
SiLveRStaRLIGHT 0
That's hilarious! Hahah!
haha_lmao_rofl 0
what the **** is wrong with you?
the_stereotype 0
he's getting even for every time you're going to mention that when he grows up, because i mean, it's a funny story. who wouldn't tell it?
lalagirl_89 0
Thatz the most cutest thing I have ever heard! You should have filmed it. =D
albertaboy 7
You want to see a video of an 8 month old boy holding his dick pissing everywhere? You're ******.
Roflsauruz 12
Well, #139- you look weird! So.... There! :/
brenton490 19
Chris Hanson date line NBC .so what are you doing here today sir? What's inter ******* bag.
aback 5
Guy humor never really changes from that.
caticaticati 3
Um... why is that an FML? Almost every single baby boy ever does that.
bmach 0
A lot of people experience similar stories to the ones posted here. Just because it can happen to other people doesn't mean it shouldn't be posted when there isn't a similar FML submission already up on the site. Besides, I don't think you'd be enjoying your newborn baby boy pissing all over the place. It's nothing to get mad over, sure, but it's not anything pleasant.
caticaticati 3
It's not pleasant, but it's not an FML if it happens to almost every single person that has a baby boy. Some FMLs might happen to more than one person but most aren't as common as a baby pissing.
possumisawesome 0
Well, I didn't know that. So, thank you to the OP for posting a funny and informational story; though it would suck to clean that up after. Besides, 41, maybe she didn't know, either?
kukopia 0
It's a 'every baby boy' story. Not a FML. MEH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
atvarela 0
**** the world
ireply_w_lyrics 0
"...No place for hidin baby No place to run You pull the trigger of my Love gun, (love gun), love gun Love gun, (love gun), love gun..."
cthulhu1138 1
This isn't an FML. It's a normal part of having a young child.
TheTruth1428 0
I agree, not a FYL. Site could use a third option for situations like this.
CFR 0
lol I love that. "When it went off" rofl