Today, I woke up to my 8 month old son happy as can be. I could hear him laughing over the monitor. When I walked into the room, he had somehow got his diaper off and was holding onto his new found penis. He thought it was hysterical when it went off and shot urine everywhere. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I thought it would be a good idea to let my 19-month-old son watch me pee, since I'm trying to potty train him. I didn't consider that he might try to grab my penis. When he did, I was startled and peed all over the floor and my son. Good job dad. FML
Today, my toddler peed in his potty for the first time. He was so excited to show me that he flung the pot in the air dousing my face with his piss. Then he laughed. FML
Today, my one year-old took his diaper off and peed on my chest while I was sleeping. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were changing our newborn son when he peed on her, making me lose it laughing. Less than five seconds later, as I picked him up to clean him off, he did a huge poop, all over my hands, arms, feet, and clothes. Instant Karma. FML
Today, my son learned how to use the toilet for the first time. He was so excited he started peeing on the floor. FML
Today, while we had my husband's boss over, my 3-year-old son decided to burst into the living room naked and yell, "Mum, look! Penis!" and wiggle it around. FML
Today, I woke up to my daughter crying, and my son running through the living room completely naked with her bottle, laughing his head off. FML
Today, I came home to find my husband and our 4-year-old son simultaneously peeing off the second-floor balcony. My husband was giggling like a little girl. FML
Today, my 2-year-old son figured out that if he takes his pull-up off and DOESN'T go on the potty, he can pee all over things. FML
Today, I woke up to my lovely 16-month old with her diaper on. When I stood up to retrieve and toss it, I also realized she'd pooped into her hand and thrown a log onto the middle of the floor. FML
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Top comments
allmidnighteyes 11
Oh, how it shot from his member like a geyser from the earth Covering the room with the bittersweet aroma of piss The drip on the walls, it running down his balls Oh the majestic beauty, splendor precipitating
Florg 0
lol he painted the room yellow, a perfect baby color.
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Comments (151)
Florg 0
lol he painted the room yellow, a perfect baby color.
egaonogenki 0
How do we know it was yellow? Maybe she said urine only because she was too ashamed to say it was actually the thick, gray one.
CurtisTheGreat 0
The kid is 8 months old... you can't be serious #34...
ChelseaAnn08 0
How is this unbelieveable? Babies that age start discovering their genitals, and figure out that it is more fun to play with their genitalia versus their fingers or toes. It's a natural thing. Every child does this.
egaonogenki 0
A genius kid started talking at 6 months, #40, and some grow faster than others, so...
Crash92 0
ah, the moment when a young man discovers his penis.
DameGreyWulf 1
egao, it's impossible for semen to be developed at six months It's a lot different from learning to talk, it has nothing to do with mental development.
meandonlyme 0
Today, i found out that my baby is capable of urination. FML
volleyballgirl16 0
no 40 was talking about 34 who said it was semen which is sorta unbelievable god people read before you say something
dragonxfly 0
he takes after his dad
Lacris 0
it might be possible have semen at 8mths. A young girl of 5mths had her first period. there has always been and will always have anomalies.
mrfuzzywiggles 11
#34, #44, y'all need to grow up.
BirdieCurls 25
#125. No, she didn't. That's physically impossible.
allmidnighteyes 11
Oh, how it shot from his member like a geyser from the earth Covering the room with the bittersweet aroma of piss The drip on the walls, it running down his balls Oh the majestic beauty, splendor precipitating
RustedMetal 0
oh it so was :')
Irefusetosay 0
lol that was lovely simply lovely
wbrycem 0
You just made taking a piss sound epic
fmlxt 3
haha, xactly
blooglekoogle 0
amazing poetry.
molly2moon 0
So.... Beatiful and epic. :')
Alinafshah2204 14
Bravo :')
teentee401 37
*wipes tear*
KBear816 0
lol wow. That reminds me of my little brother who used to run around and try to pee on my friends when he discovered his...
joy_nash 7
ive had an experience like that with one of my younger brothers xD
maichido 0
Aww. x]
TheCoolGuy3434 0
lol
Huevo_fml 0
I thought this fml was hysterical
falling_over 0
Don't worry, thats totally normal behavior for little boys.
lovelylady2016 6
What if they don't grow out of it?
TheLoneWolf87 4
Sixth! Moving up! Hahaha. Fire Fire! I'll put it out! Edit: Hey u stole my glory bitch!
DoveOrHawk 5
You were 8th... fail .-.
fretforyerlatte 0
ohh, the joys of parenthood!
haha_lmao_rofl 0
oh get over it. that is so not a FML situation. some ppl on here actually post getting caught trying to suck their own dicks. so yeah, you'll live
slasher29 0
i haven't seen any
Chaith 16
http://www.fmylife.com/intimacy/2696 Well, now you have!
Monado 0
So out of THEIR OWN FAULT they try and suck their dick. While the people who are at no fault of their own have to clean up the pee of a baby that is all over the room. How is this not an FML?
gigi37 0
Because it's a baby; that's what they do and that's what parents should expect.
Vanita 1
Urine all over the walls and furniture etc.? Seriously, from the experience with my two little brothers, I would not expect that. It's not as common as you seem to think.
blooglekoogle 0
oh no someone let their anger out and made other people laugh! CALL THE ******* COPS!