Today, I woke up to my 8 month old son happy as can be. I could hear him laughing over the monitor. When I walked into the room, he had somehow got his diaper off and was holding onto his new found penis. He thought it was hysterical when it went off and shot urine everywhere. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I thought it would be a good idea to let my 19-month-old son watch me pee, since I'm trying to potty train him. I didn't consider that he might try to grab my penis. When he did, I was startled and peed all over the floor and my son. Good job dad. FML
Today, my toddler peed in his potty for the first time. He was so excited to show me that he flung the pot in the air dousing my face with his piss. Then he laughed. FML
Today, my one year-old took his diaper off and peed on my chest while I was sleeping. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were changing our newborn son when he peed on her, making me lose it laughing. Less than five seconds later, as I picked him up to clean him off, he did a huge poop, all over my hands, arms, feet, and clothes. Instant Karma. FML
Today, my son learned how to use the toilet for the first time. He was so excited he started peeing on the floor. FML
Today, while we had my husband's boss over, my 3-year-old son decided to burst into the living room naked and yell, "Mum, look! Penis!" and wiggle it around. FML
Today, I woke up to my daughter crying, and my son running through the living room completely naked with her bottle, laughing his head off. FML
Today, I came home to find my husband and our 4-year-old son simultaneously peeing off the second-floor balcony. My husband was giggling like a little girl. FML
Today, my 2-year-old son figured out that if he takes his pull-up off and DOESN'T go on the potty, he can pee all over things. FML
Today, I woke up to my lovely 16-month old with her diaper on. When I stood up to retrieve and toss it, I also realized she'd pooped into her hand and thrown a log onto the middle of the floor. FML
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Top comments
allmidnighteyes 11
Oh, how it shot from his member like a geyser from the earth Covering the room with the bittersweet aroma of piss The drip on the walls, it running down his balls Oh the majestic beauty, splendor precipitating
Florg 0
lol he painted the room yellow, a perfect baby color.
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Comments (151)
LALALALagirrl 1
LMAAAOO, ahh that made me smile:) funny kid, lol
xNatsuki 0
Well at least it's a good story to tell to your future daughter in law.
NostalgiaFreak9 43
Oh god no.
jonny2x4 0
He's practicing to become a fireman.
Rakayum 0
it IS pretty funny now that i think about it.
xx_cole 0
... and? He's a baby. Although it does kind of suck, it shouldn't be that surprising.
albinoninja 0
this is utterly ****** hilarious!
Melisaaaa 0
Why The Hell Is This An FML?! Are you kidding me with this shit? My son is 2 and has been fascinated with his penis since he was 6 months old. And He STILL Loves To Watch Himself Pee. Just wait till you wipe him when you change his diaper and he laughs hysterically because it feels good. The people that modded this obviously have never been around a baby boy.
Monado 0
Well you may find baby urine cute, but the rest of us do not. Espically when it's all over the room.
nypd613 0
I had a similar fml but it got moderated out :(. only I was changing my nephew's diaper while it happened and it got all over me! I was so startled and grossed out that I shouted "****!" and he found that so funny he started giggling. he laughed harder every time I said over and over "****!" while I ran to get towels.
JeanJV7 0
haha, everyone needs to calm down.
Monado 0
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