Today, I woke up to my 5-year-old standing over me with a pillow. I asked him what he was doing, and he replied that he and Steve were playing a game, but Steve said I have to be asleep for it. Steve is my son's imaginary friend. I'm convinced Steve wants to kill me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I woke up to my 7 year old son angrily trying to smother me with a pillow. FML
Today, I woke up to my 5-year-old son covering my nose and mouth with his hand and complaining, "Noooo, you need to die now." FML
Today, my 5-year-old son woke up early and ran into my bedroom to wake me up. Unfortunately, he did this by jumping onto my bed, slamming his knee into my balls in the process. I had to explain my tears of agony away by claiming I was just so happy to see him. FML
How could you?
Today, I was woken up by my 5 year-old daughter hitting me with a pillow because she had a dream that I was using her toothbrush on the dog. We don't have a dog. She is now refusing to brush her teeth. FML
Boundaries
Today, my son climbed into our bed because he'd had a nightmare. He and my wife spent hours whispering and giggling like they were at a slumber party. Cute, until the next morning, when they were both tired, grumpy, and uncooperative. FML
Fundies say the darndest things
Today, after my father in law upset my 6-year-old son by telling him creating a world in Minecraft is a sin, because only god is allowed to create worlds so all Minecraft players will burn in hell one day, it's been 5 days since he's slept right because he’s scared the Devil will burn him if he falls asleep. FML
Today, I was lying beside my 5-year-old son to help him get to sleep. He turned his head and asked, "Daddy, why do you suck so much?" FML
Today, I was babysitting a 4-year-old, and we decided to play a game of hide and seek. Before he started to count, he looked me in the eyes and said that if I hid in his spot, he'd murder me with a knife when he grows up. I have to babysit this kid for the rest of the summer. FML
Today, I found a disturbing video on my 8-year-old's tablet. In the video, I was suffering from sleep paralysis. He's convinced I'm part demon. FML
Today, I found out that my 4-year-old son is truly convinced that I am a ghost. He also thinks that I died from burning, "because of your face". FML
Top comments
asoep 4
run, run far away
Trivision 10
Oh no, not another Paranormal Activity! This will be like, what? 27?
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Comments (190)
DMalones 1
You should look into therapists
3mILY_maRy629 11
Umm this sounds like some Paranormal Activity movie shit... My advice is to not be like those idiots and get the hell outta that house!
hardcorepuppy 8
Thats like straight from a horror movie. **** that shit kill your son first lol. Im kidding don't do that.
bakabaka714 8
OP this does raise some cause for alarm, kids are sensitive to spirit, and demonic energies, some grow out of it and lose their ability, others keep it and grow it as they age, if this problem persists and gets worse, like your sons behavior changes drastically, don't hesitate to talk to a medium, or your local paranormal team
BriannaMGK 15
This is so true. When I was little, I used to see, talk to, and play with my grandpas spirit. He died a week before my mom found out she was pregnant. I was 2 when I started to see him, and I'd talk about him to my mom, which creeped her out because no one had ever told me about him. I grew out of it.
bakabaka714 8
oh wow! I myself actually kept my abilities, I had an imaginary friend well he's not imaginary, my abilities and two other mediums back me up with this, the only thing is, I don't know, how or why he came to be with me, aside from a name, a description thats been burned into my memory since I was aware of him, and a couple theories I have, he's not quite related to me as my family is...its quite strange.
AlexAlxAlex 2
Modern Pillows are actually made with materials so you can breathe through them in a situation like that. Dont jump to the worst straight away it might have been a surprise pillow fight?
hiholls 13
Nice name OP
GetSomeM0 24
have someone pray for that child, thats not okay
worldclassrager 41
Hope your address isn't 215...
Bluecollargang_ 8
Nope nope nope nope.
onorexveritas 24
at least its not toby