Today, I found out that my 4-year-old son is truly convinced that I am a ghost. He also thinks that I died from burning, "because of your face". FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my 4-year-old son is distraught. This morning we saw a man, dressed as Santa, passed out drunk on a public bench. My son is now convinced that it was his corpse, and that Santa Claus is dead. FML
Today, my 10-year-old son told my 5-year-old daughter that we're a ghost family, and told her to run through our glass door to see for herself. She believed it, ran straight into the door, and ended up having to be taken to hospital. FML
Today, my six-year-old son told me my makeup looks like his grandmother's did in the casket. FML
Today, I woke up to my 5-year-old son covering my nose and mouth with his hand and complaining, "Noooo, you need to die now." FML
Today, my teenage son taught my five-year-old daughter how to fake her own death. I walked into the kitchen today to find her lying still on the floor, covered in ketchup. She laughed when I began to scream. FML
Today, my 4-year-old son cut half of my hair when I was asleep because he thought I would look better that way. FML
Today, my four-year-old asked me when I was going to die. I replied "Not for a long time, why?" He looked at me and stated "Because I only want to live with Daddy." FML
Today, I'm beginning to regret explaining death to my 3-year-old son. We were at the supermarket when he looked at an elderly woman and loudly told her "You're gonna die soon!" FML
Today, I accused my son of faking being sick. He then blew chunks all over me. FML
Today, my son, who seems to think that he is a "gangsta" despite being a white boy from the suburbs, cried because I accidentally burned his grilled cheese. He's 28. FML
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Top comments
travellingfun 18
Kids have wild imaginations and no filter on what they say, don't take it too personally!
acommonman 23
just have fun with it OP, kids believe in crazy things.
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Comments (40)
mushroomcassette 21
Children are brutally honest. If you wanted a liar, you should look elsewhere.
AninOnin 24
Ha! Children can be brutally honest or just brutal. I know some angels; I also know some children who would not hesitate to try and make you feel crappy.
wasalsa2 7
you have a melty face
kirigaiku 15
Did something happen to your face?
Fuaaad1994 31
Someone poured coffee on it and ran off
wtffml1979 22
I see what you did there....
granCanyon 12
How do you know you're not?
saraitkddh 47
If what you are saying is right then this means FML is haunted...
Morning_fml 22
I didn't know they had wifi in the after life.
granCanyon 12
some people are taking comments too seriously! It was a freaking joke...
countryb_cth 38
You realize they were both making jokes? Maybe you should take your own advice.
Soundslikeothers 15
Might want to call a priest
wtffml1979 22
Time for some proactive
codytallica 38
Insert witty comment here!
SystemofaBlink41 27
Insert witty, better reply here!
Noah197099 17
Try to convince him that he's a ghost, and see what happens.
albertozeta_fml 9
"If I'm a ghost, you are a handkerchief"
cheeeksss 29
It's alright OP. When I was really young, I thought my mom was a robot because she never showed emotion towards anything (she was a very strict and traditional Asian mom). I grew up and realized my parents are awesome. The same shall happen for you.